A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi , So i have been dating this guy for 2 years now and initially when i told him that i would like to marry in the future and if he can marry me then i will be ok to go out with him , he was fine with it . I am facing tremendous pressure to get married from my home and his parents are not agreeing for the match since we have different caste and are from different regions. Still he was ready to go ahead to marry me but now in past few months , his family has dumped all the responsibilities of his elder brother on him ( who is basically jobless , and is married with a kid on the way ) and so he is now not sure if he wants to marry and he says he needs more time and i am scared that after an year he will say the same that he needs more time and i will keep waiting for him . Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  +, writes (3 November 2016):
 It sounds like this guy's family is (understandably) very important to him.
If you do get married, your marriage could be a constant source of friction between your husband and his family. Perhaps this is why he is having doubts about going ahead and getting married, as he realizes how difficult life will be if he chooses this route.
I think setting a time limit is a very good compromise. Tell him "you have x number of months to make up your mind". If he has not committed to marrying you in that time, cut your losses and get out of the relationship.
Good luck.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2016): That's very selfish of his family. If he can't stand up to his family for you then you might have to reevaluate whether this is the guy for you. He should understand the tremendous pressure that I'm sure you're under. You had made it clear in the very beginning that you would go out with him with the end goal of marriage. Give him a time limit by which you want to see yourself married. If he doesn't agree/limit passes with no progress then part ways with him.
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