A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I have a wonderful boyfriend of 5 months. Originally we took our time getting to know each other before taking it to the next level.Now, that we have mentioned to each other that we are both ready. Every time we get sexual, it seems he has issues keeping it up. I wonder if it is erectile dysfunction , anxiety or me? I am in my mid 20s and he is in his early 30s.He finally told me he has always had issues in his past relationships. He told me that he doesn't enjoy sex much and only can have sex with me when he is in the mood. Is this normal or just an excuse? i know he is not gay. he does get excited when he sees me and we are together. Any advice or input would be great or any comments on someone who has been or is in a similar situation? Thanks so much!
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (4 November 2016):
 I think if he has always been this way then he should get himself checked out by a doctor. It could be something serious and that is why he needs to rule these out. Yes most probable it is anxiety but still try and get him to see someone.
A
female
reader, Soup1129 +, writes (3 November 2016):
I feel like my husband is the same way! Just finding out about this with him. Glad you found that out before it's too late like get married! Ugh I wish I would've known about it before but we were in honeymoon stage and he was drunk every time we had sex, never initiated, still doesn't. He's so private and never wants to talk about sex. I don't think he's gay, maybe just keep bringing up the subject and ask what he likes and doesn't like? It could be anxiety, maybe he's had a bad sexual history like sexual abuse or he doesn't feel adequate. Lots of what ifs. Keep probing and if he shuts down then I'd see a counselor. Let him know how you feel.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2016): It could be anxiety most probably. Get him to relax. Maybe counselling would help, and to be sure maybe he should have a check up with his doctor.
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