A
female
age
30-35,
*radlerobber24
writes:My boyfriend has a lot of friends who are girls. This doesn't bother me in the least...except when it comes to one specific girl. I try not to let it get to me, but I am starting to feel extremely jealous of this one in particular and frustrated when my boyfriend even mentions her name. It feels like she comes up in conversations at least once to twice a day. I think he knows it upsets me, but he doesn't feel like he should give up his friendship with her...and I agree! I don't want him to feel like he has to hide his friendship with this girl in order for him to be able to talk to her because the last thing I want him to do is lie to me about it. How do I tell my boyfriend my feelings on this without making him mad and what is a possible solution (if any) that we can both live with?
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female
reader, cradlerobber24 +, writes (8 January 2010):
cradlerobber24 is verified as being by the original poster of the question alejandro,
Thank you for your advice, it really helped...you mentioned that after years of friendship they are probably just friends. Well, he only just met this girl a few months ago and I was just wondering if you think that would change things. Since his friendship with her is relatively new, could that potentially lead him to consider her as a possible romantic relationship?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2010): It's the girls he doesn't talk about that you have to worry about, not the ones he has open friendships with. Maybe you just don't like this particular girl, and that can be a pain when you have to listen to your boyfriend droning on about her. As long as he doesn't expect you to hang out with her too often don't let it be a problem. You can't tell him who to be friends with and he can't tell you who to like.
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A
male
reader, alejandro  +, writes (6 January 2010):
OH the story of my life. My best friend is a girl, and we are very close. I have had gf's in the past that I have actually ended relationships with them because they were so jealous of our friendship. Most guys that have girls as close friends have only that a friendship with them. After years of friendship with a girl there is usually no romantic feelings there.
You should to take some time and get to know this girl and see what makes her such a good friend to your bf. Befriending her could help make your relationship stronger and help you see why they are such good friends. If you do talk to your bf, stay calm don't yell or blame him of cheating or anything like that. Explain to him that you trust him but you feel like she is taking a lot of your time. Just remmeber to stay calm. Best of luck.
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A
female
reader, love6269 +, writes (6 January 2010):
Let him do what he wants. If you show that you don't trust him, he might take it the wrong way. If he proves to you that you can trust him, I would let him do whatever he wants. But if it comes to a point when you feel he isn't being completely honest about something, or could possibly be cheating, bring it up and talk to him about it. But if it's really bothering you that bad, maybe you should talk to him about it. You can't control who he's friends with, and yeah, he's going to have friends. You have just have to trust him.
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