A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello,I have just found out that my boyfriend watches porn. I have had a look on this site and at some porn related questions, and some people say it's fine and all men do it, and some people say they should stop in a relationship.My problem is, my boyfriend watched LIVE porn, LIVE girls! on cam. that you can talk to.. and ask them what you want them to do.So there is communication involved...I'm stressing out about it. I've never thought badly of men watching porn, but.. I genuinely feel cheated on!But now I think, if I ask him to stop... surely he will just say he will then carry on! And I'll never know...Arghh! Any help would be much appreciated!!!!!! x
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female
reader, maverick494  +, writes (23 May 2012):
I'm quite an easygoing gal when it comes to porn in general, but this would be crossing the line for me. Like others have said, it's the interaction that matters. Porn video's are made with mass audience in mind. The people in that video have no clue who ends up watching those vids and the only interaction they have is with each other, not the viewer. That's why it's hard for people in porn to maintain a relationship on the side as they're basically cheating on their bf/gf every time they work.
The interaction your bf has with the cam girls is intimate, even if they're not in the same room. I would not be comfortable with it, in fact, I'd kick him to the curb the moment I'd catch him doing that.
You are not comfortable with it and therefore this is a deal breaker. Dump this guy and find someone who does care about you.
A
male
reader, i'm saleem. Help me  +, writes (22 May 2012):
Ask him why he goes online when you are there? Your future relation depends on his answer
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2012): Regular porn is bad enough, actually contacting them is unforgiveable.
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A
female
reader, Cupid_or_Stupid +, writes (22 May 2012):
 The problem with Live porn is the interaction. If he isn't speaking to them or they aren't speaking back then it doesn't really matter if she's live or not. He's still gonna watch her do her stuff and get off to it.From experience I know that not all live performers talk back, and sometimes there are so many people talking that they may not even take notice of your boyfriend (Some sites even have limited numbers of viewers who can send messages). My boyfriend sometimes watches live porn but he doesn't talk to them, which I, personally, am ok with. If he's kept this from you then maybe he feels bad about it and then you've got to ask yourself why he feels bad about it. Maybe it is cheating?If you don't feel comfortable with it or the relationship then you need to ask yourself if you really want to be with him.I hope this helps :) x
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A
female
reader, Foot-In-My-Mouth +, writes (22 May 2012):
 It IS cheating. Now you decide whether you're okay with infidelity or you want to get out of this relationship.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2012): If he is having contact with these women and asking them to perform sexual acts for him while he watches them and masturbates. Then he is cheating on you. I wouldnt trust a partner that was behaving like. It is too messed up and shows he doesnt know how to behave when he has a partner. He is putting his sexual desires for others before your relationship. The trust would be gone. I would deal with it by explaining that I consider it cheating and it is not for me. Then I would leave him to it and seek someone better.
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A
female
reader, Alex242 +, writes (22 May 2012):
This is very close to cheating, if not cheating. I say that anything with interaction is crossing the line.
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A
female
reader, BettyBoup +, writes (22 May 2012):
 I agree. You decide what you are happy with in a relationship. You're not happy with this so leave him. I know you like him but you don't want men who do things that make you uncomfortable. There are guys who don't watch live porn, and who wouldn't do something they knew made you unhappy. Keep looking for someone like that. Goodluck!
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A
female
reader, BettyBoup +, writes (22 May 2012):
I agree. You decide what you are happy with in a relationship. You're not happy with this so leave him. I know you like him but you don't want men who do things that make you uncomfortable. There are guys who don't watch live porn, and who wouldn't do something they knew made you unhappy. Keep looking for someone like that. Goodluck!
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (22 May 2012):
 You decide your own rules. He is free to do all this while he is single but when he is with you, he can't, in front of you or in secret.
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