A
female
age
36-40,
*ritt320
writes:Me and my bf have been with each other for 8 months. we asked his cousins to come play cards and they did. we all got totally wasted on vodka and beer and they were takinh pills. well i passed out in the next room and i woke up wondering were my bf was. well i go to our bedroom and the doors locked and i open it and there he is lying there naked with his naked cousin holding her. they both say they did do nothing but they cant even remember... what do i do? i cant stop thinking about it did he really have sex with her or anything ????
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (31 October 2010):
 That makes sense Cerberus. I have blacked out before on alcohol (in my younger days!), but I've never personally combined them with pills. I've woken up in weird places and didn't remember how I got there.
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (30 October 2010):
 Didn't know beer+vodka+pills+cousin= incestuous behavior.
The evidence points to he cheated, we know evidence doesn't lie. But cheating boyfriends, and more than kissing cousins do.
Dump him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2010): Yeah they did have sex and at least one if not both of them remember so they're lying.
You don't end up naked in bed with a person of the opposite sex, completely wasted, completely naked and holding them and have nothing happen, you know that.
They're lying to protect their own asses, I've taken that combination of drink and drugs lots and lots of times. I can tell you without a shadow of a doubt I remember pretty much everything I've ever done, not always in great detail but something as complex as getting with a girl and all the effort that requires, I do. If I completely black out, then I'm passed out and am incapable of doing anything.
If you've ever taken pills you'll know, they keep you energetic, lucid and awake, alcohol has very little effect when you're high on pills, you can drink it like water and while you might not remember every detail of everything you said, you do remember actions and events. I do know some people who can do things while blacked out, but by some strange coincidence it's only the real bad things they can't remember, when they could have taken more of the same drink and drugs another time and have a great time and remember everything.
It is very unlikely that neither of them remember what happened, they got together and ended up in bed together and had some kind of sexual contact. All of these events are too complex actions for neither of them to remember what happened. Especially the cousin, you're a woman you know when you've had sex, even us guys know when it's happened too. You know when you've been touched down there even, sexual contact is too messy not know it's happened.
Only you can decide what to do next, but I'd take your time and have a nice long think, because they did this right under your nose and he did cheat on you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2010): The door was locked. They knew that they were doing something that they didn't want others to see, so they locked it. I think that shows that this wasn't just random and it wasn't accidental.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (30 October 2010):
First of all, good god. I actually believe the BF when he says he can't remember anything. Vodka and pills and beer.
However, and this is absolutely crucial. They had sex, no doubt about it. He needs to get tested for STD's, and you need to leave him and find someone whose sole purpose in life isn't vodka, pills, and his naked cousin.
He's responsible for his actions, even if he blacked out during them.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (30 October 2010):
He did cheat on you. You found them naked in bed together, and he was holding her. They did it, and their lies are enough that you should dump them both from your life. Of course they remember. That's why there were naked there holding each other.
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