A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Hello. I have a problem. My bf wants us to live in the same house as his parents. And even if I like them, I'm not sure I want to live quite so close to them. What should I do: tell him no and maybe lose him or agree to it? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (27 May 2010):
I also agree with Daniel. You let them in, and they will control your every move. So I would say that it's not the best idea. And if he does dump you, then you know that his parents mean more to him than you. Don;t do it.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (27 May 2010):
Why would you two live with his parents? If you are in the 26-29 age group you both should be old enough to have jobs and a place of your own.
Sorry, I adore my FIL ( Father In Law) but there is no way I would live with him.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (27 May 2010):
You shouldn't have to lose your boyfriend just for refusing to live with his parents. And then, it's usually best for a couple to live in a different home. Relatives do mess with couples. Don't let them do it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2010): (The question asker):
Yes, we live together now and we make enough to live alone. It's not like we're 17 and not really indipendent. The reason he wants to live with them is because when we have kids (planning next year) he wants them to babysit and stuff. His parents lived with his father's parents and he always liked having his his grandparents so close, and they all got along nicely. And now he wants us to do the same. It's a really big house (14 rooms, or something) so it's not like we would live in their garage or basement. But it still feels weird.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2010): Well there are a few things to consider first. Have you lived alone with your boyfriend before? Have you ever lived on your own? Are you two financially able to live on your own together? If any of these are answered yes then there really isn't a reason for you two to move in to his parent's place. You won't be happy because even though you like them you two are adults and need your own space. It would be like going back to being a child again, living with parents, not to mention the awkwardness of them knowing you two get busy, and then what if they heard you... I think you should express your concern to him and if he doesn't understand then maybe you should go searching for a man who acts like a man and wants to be independent like a man? Just my opinion.
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