A
female
age
51-59,
*onas
writes:I am 48 years old and in a telation with a man my age ,we r engaged but since i knew him i felt that there is something missing in the relation and i wasn't sure that i love him and kept postponing marriage.he is so kind with me and generous in money issues .but sometimes he gets out of money and i lend him and he return it. days ago he was at my house and he took money from my bag without telling me. I discovered aftet he left and called him and told him u took money from my wallet in my bag First he said no and how come u accuse me of such a thing and i told him u r a thief and i ended the relationThen second day he sent me a message addmiting that he took it because he wanted to gey my fruits when he went out to get cigarrets and he exceeded his atm limit and didnt have money and didnt find fruit around but couldnt put the money back in my bagThen third day he sent that he took the money as a test for my trust to him because i always hesitste about our relation and he wantedto know if i trust him ir not and that if i find missing money i wont ever think that he is the one who took it. And i failed in the test and he is so sad that i dont trust him. I dont believe these excuses and i told him no way back together. He is going crazy sending messages that i am the love of his life and he is not a thief it was a test. Now i dont know y i am sad. Am i right in my deciision to keave him forever or he might be not lying and he took the money for that stupid reasonNote :i suspected once before that he took the same amout of money from my bag but i convinced my self that i counted my money wrong. Plz help me
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2017): You definitely made the right decision breaking up with him. The most concerning part is how he lied about it after, and made up three- yes THREE different stories on different days. That to me says this man is a pathological liar. He is so generous with money you say? It is probably all stolen! Maybe from different women! Here is the thing- if he had been short on change and you weren't around, so maybe he needed to borrow some- FINE but you TELL the person the moment you see them "oh honey I had to borrow some cash from your wallet, I will repay it next time I'm at the bank" -- that would be okay because sometimes people are caught short BUT the fact is he wasn't borrowing it, he was going to lie about it, he DID lie about it. THat to me says that he is extremely dishonest and is probably dishonest in many ways. Sure he is pulling out all his defenses now and trying to get you emotional about your dead father and how great a person he is. Well he would probably steal from the grave of your dead father if he had the chance. Do not forgive him!
A
female
reader, Monas +, writes (6 October 2017):
Monas is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNow he sent me his location at my dead father's cemetry. He said he dreamt of him and he decided to visit him to tell him he is not a theif and that he loves me and i will never find one who loves me and take cate of me like him
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A
female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (6 October 2017):
 You're definitely right in breaking up with him. That was the best move that you could have made.
It doesn't matter if he spends money on you, the fact of the matter is that he is a thief and a liar.
Cut all contact with him and block him on your cellphone and every social media site that you have him on.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2017): You are correct there is no test.
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A
female
reader, ALM12  +, writes (5 October 2017):
 NEVER EVER SPEAK TO HIM AGAIN! who lies like that especially if their you boyfriend.. no no no ... hes not worth it
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (5 October 2017):
 Block him from contacting you. Off course he is only using excuses. He is doing that only because he has been caught. If he loved you he would not be trying to test you, neither would he be stealing from you. Off course you are sad, but stay strong and block his phone number.
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A
female
reader, Monas +, writes (5 October 2017):
Monas is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThe weird thing that he spends a lot when we go out together.he is genorous with me and the money he took from my wallet is nothing compared to what he spends in our outings
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (5 October 2017):
 STOP TALKING TO HIM!
Who the hell steals from the woman they love and calls it a "test"?? He IS a scumbag, as Honeypie has said. He is a horrible human being, and you need to GET AWAY FROM HIM!
Every time you come into contact with him puts yourself at risk. He'll steal your identity and destroy your future. Anyone who can steal from those they say they love are the worst humans on the planet. Even many criminals have codes where they never harm their own family.
Block his emails and texts. Get away from him because he is dangerous. He wasn't "testing" you. He was stealing from you because he saw you and everything you own as property. AND he's a thief.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (5 October 2017):
 Wow, OP I think you NEED to realize that your now-ex-bf is a scumbag. A thieving scumbag.
He actually had the NERVE to tell you he took the money as a test? And that YOU failed? What a load of camel dung!
I think he took the money because he isn't good with money and he needed/wanted cash - you had some so he took some. What kind of partner doesn't say:" hey I'm low on funds and need some cigarettes can you spare a few?" My husband would NEVER go into my purse without asking. (my kids do.. but they always tell me, hey mom I grabbed a $5)
You had second thoughts about this man, you had second thoughts about marriage. Now you know what kind of man he is.
He is the kind of man who doesn't OWN his own actions, who doesn't take responsibility for his actions either... He actually had the NERVE to put the blame on you. that is not a good man.
I would stop all contact and block him. Time to move on.
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