A
female
age
30-35,
*rueLoveWaits2016
writes:2 years ago I broke up w/the 1st guy that I ever loved. We weren't compatible as we had different political and religious views (both things are very important to me). I was completely and utterly in love, felt like a total dream. He took me for granted, looked at other women (when we were out he told me he had never seen so many hot women in one place), brought me dead flowers on several occasions and was never there for me when I needed him the most. I one time told him I was feeling taken for granted and he said I was just being a woman. I could feel his feelings for me slipping and he ended up lying to me one time about having to stay at work late, just to tell me he had gone to his regular bar.Though I have dated a couple guys after, none of them I qualify as my 2nd love, which my current bf is. This love feels different, like I guess more realistic. He doesn't do anything that my ex did and esp love that he never makes comments about other women. Why does the love feel different?
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female
reader, femmenoir  +, writes (2 November 2017):
 It's great that you've found somebody new and that's a real positive in your life.
If you had found another guy who was very similar to your first love, you'd probably be very unhappy now and you'd be questioning why you attracted the same type of guy again.
Each relationship is very different and will bring something new to the table and that's how it should be.
Learn to accept and appreciate all the differences, because no two people will ever be the same.
No matter who you meet, you will always go through your ups and downs together and this is ok too, because in the real world, this is how all relationships operate, granted some people have more ups and downs than others.
As you both grow together, everything will start to feel more natural and more comfortable for you.
The important thing to remember here though, is to not compare your current partner to your ex partner, even if he isn't doing some of the more positive things that your ex did.
It's best to put any comparisons behind you and let go of the past ans start truly embracing what you currently have.
It sounds as though this new man in your life is a much better suit to you anyway, because he doesn't do some of the negative things that your ex did, which is great and you wouldn't want it any other way.
You should always take the good out of every relationship and hang onto that, because this guy is a different guy and he shows you more respect and treats you better.
Appreciate all the good that he brings into this relationship with you and don't forget to show him regular appreciation for all the good he does.
He must do the same for you.
For many people, it can take many new relationships until they finally meet Mr or Mrs Right, "the one".
When you do meet "the one" you'll just know.
All the best.
A
female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (6 October 2017):
 Firstly, I'm glad that you've found love again.
Don't be scared away by the feeling of a new and different love because the truth is, no relationship or love will ever feel the same and that's actually a good thing. It's a new opportunity to learn and to love again. It may feel odd at first but as time goes on it will start to feel more natural and enjoyable. Different is good. Granted, if things felt the same, you wouldn't feel as excited about this new love as you are now.
Enjoy your new relationship and build some new and happy memories.
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