A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:How do I stop obsessing about my current relationship? I am involved with an absolutely wonderful guy and I know part of the problem is ME! I sometimes feel like he's way out of my league. He's incredibly smart, funny, interesting and comes from a diverse background. I have to pinch myself sometimes to remember he's really with ME. Normally don't feel this insecure in my relationships, but this one keeps me on my toes. I always worry he's going to get bored with me, not that I'm ugly or unintelligent, I just don't feel like I'm quite on his level. And I'm learning that men are not as sexual as I always thought they were. But it still bugs me when we go for a week without having sex because he normally likes it every day. I tell myself he's just under stress, but my tendency is to worry that he's getting bored. Of course, I keep my mouth shut about all these insecurities but it's so exhausting because my brain is always working overtime and my emotions are feeling a bit stretched. Even though I don't tell him how much I obsessed about things I don't know how to stop!! I guess I can't believe my good fortune, at having found such a wonderful, sexy man and I keep thinking it's not going to last. Why am I like this? It's insanity. Really!
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female
reader, amber2328  +, writes (12 February 2008):
 I know exactly how you feel and rcn is right everyone looks at you differently! You are going to destroy your relationship if you continue to be so insecure loving someone so much is the scariest feeling in the world but also the best. Let him love you I am sure you deserve him....
A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (12 February 2008):
 I'd hate to be living inside your head. It sounds like the circus came and made up camp. lol
What I want you to do is view your relationship different. Why do you think you should analyze why he's with you. He has his reasons. You may not agree within your self, but you're the one who lives with doubt, self esteem etc. He lives with his own issues.
I don't know what sort of music you listen too, but there is this singer in the U.S. that was listed within the top 10 sexiest men. They asked him how he felt about it. He said "You know I see myself naked every day, and have never looked at myself that way."
Your position in the relationship is not to judge why he's with you, you've decided and know why it is you're with him. You can drive yourself nuts trying to figure out the other side, but just as the singer, we all view ourselves different from the inside than other people do looking in.
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