A
female
age
30-35,
*ecapitatedme
writes:So I'm hoping to attempt to make this question relatively short. I really need some advice because there's no one else in my life right now *sadface*. Soo I recently moved in with my bf and it goes well on some says, not so well on others. Sometimes he'll be so loving says he loves me and never wants to be without me or mylove, and other times hell give me one word answers, through the phone or in person. When I try and bring things up, like problems that I have with him he'll call me bitchy or being too "girly". He's a hypocrite too, he'll want me to treat him extra special when he's sad but when I'm sad he tells me I'm being annoying. but sometimes when I'm sad he'll be loving and nice. that's just the tip of the iceberg but my hands hurt and I just need some quick advice. help?
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2010): You are too young to have to be saddled with this man. You don't "NEED" to live with him do you? Can you move back in with your parents or relatives or on your own..wherever you were before you met him?
Don't "settle" for this passive-aggressive behavior. Perhaps he isn't that into you and has no one else (sad face) either..so he is with you. Horrible thought?
Don't continue..get pregnant..have a family..not be able to afford to go to school or training or work your way up through the ranks..as you will have little ones..and lots of bills ..
These emotionally abusive men are all over out there. Don't tell him you are leaving. He will stop you or try very hard to stop you. Move your stuff...all of it...OUT while he is gone and make sure your support group (parents, siblings or friends) keep up your resolve not to TALK to him and NOT to meet him alone..etc. Just get OUT before you get dragged in, under and drown.
A
male
reader, Ven  +, writes (19 October 2010):
The two of you lack cohesion in your communication. It isn't your fault, but it isn't necessarily his either.I would recommend couples counseling simply because it is the best way to get both of you focused and talking about long-term fixes in the relationship, not just dealing with the conversation at hand.
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A
male
reader, jeffers1 +, writes (19 October 2010):
Best advice I can offer is when he is 'off' leave him alone and definately do not challenge the situation. The more you push him the worse he'll get.I think if you can do the above he will be more receptive - he sounds a little up and down so he could be a little depressive - pushing him will make this worse.Some poeple use this tatic for attention - seems odd but its true - if you leave him alone he will come to you and then you will get some attention that you seem to also be craving.
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