A
female
age
36-40,
*mszy
writes:I just found out my boyfriend of 6 months is gay. 6 months may not seem like a long time at all, but for me it feels like my whole world….and yet it feels like it wasn’t long enough. It is all to hard to explain how I feel but I keep trying and I know people are getting bored, I just can’t stop talking about him, thinking about him. I never told anyone he is gay though, too ashamed, don’t want to say it aloud, don’t want it to be real. However, I don’t really think it is the fact he is gay, It is just he’s not with me. I somehow feel happier knowing he wont be with another girl, then I think about the other side. If he is gay, which he is so I don’t know why I started that sentence with doubt, so if he is gay why be in a relationship with me? He said he didn’t know, I don’t completely believe that. How could he kiss me, have sex with me…tell me he loved me. I’m so angry that he let me fall in love with him, and I’m so angry that I let it happen too. I never trust boys, I suppose it was first proper relationship, well I never felt this way before anyway. I have had longer relationships, but it wasn’t the same. We connected, clicked, just seemed it was meant to be, and he ruined it. I’m so angry he let it be over and at the same time I’m angry he let it start. He was the one who asked me out, he kissed me first, he asked me to go away for a weekend, he was the one that said he loved me. I don’t know how I should be feeling, I’m angry, I’m upset, yet I miss him. He is sorry, wants to be friends. We talk about every second day. Then I tell myself I can’t get over him like this so I tell myself I won’t talk to him for a long time, and I get a text, is it him, no it’s not, maybe I should call him and I do. I want to forget him and get over him, then I don’t, I want to talk to him…I want him back. Everything reminds me of him, stupid clichés make sense, actually understanding what the song lyrics mean, the term heartbroken, it makes sense now, I wish it didn’t. I don’t want to be this girl, the annoying girl who just can’t get over her ex, this silly girl. How do I get over him?
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female
reader, MochaLady7  +, writes (1 March 2009):
I totally understand what you are going through. 6 months is a long time to be with someone. I spent a year and a half with my boyfriend. He told me over email that he was gay and that he could not do our relationship any longer.
It's not going to be easy being friends. But give yourself time to be single and to be by yourself without him. If in time you think that you could be friends. Then move on to that state. But you can't truly be friend with him if you have feelings of anger and hate. It's hard. I know. You want to call him or text him everyday. I want so many answers right now. But the true is, he probably can't get you everything you want now.
Good luck with your future boyfriends. There are other boys out there. I promise.
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (16 December 2008):
 You're angry at him with very good reason. The man deceived you and played with your feelings. He faked a love he didn't feel and used you for cover. That is very, very bad.
My opinion is that you should not let this bad experience take control of your life. Make a conscious decision to put him behind you. Bad things happen, but life is beautiful and we need to enjoy it. Let him be with anyone he wishes, and give yourself a break.
I want the best for you. I want you to be happy and to put this pain behind you. You need to help yourself by making the conscious decision to do so.
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A
female
reader, kurayami3nobara +, writes (16 December 2008):
Take a deep breath. Think about if you really want to hurt him for making you hurt. If you still love him, you shouldn't want to hurt him, no matter what he's done. I don't think being angry with him will help. I think you need to tell him how betrayed you feel and you need to redefine your relationship. If you can handle being friends, and want to be by him to support him, then hold your head high and do that. If it's beyond you, and you're too hurt to ever see him again, then explain that to him and part ways.
Take comfort in the fact that he probably wasn't lying when he said he loved you. Actually, you probably mean a lot to him because the relationship with you made him discover he was gay. A realization like that is important, no matter what gender or age you are. I don't think it's either of your faults; you weren't lacking, you're just not what he realized he needed. You can't change who you are. It's all right. Do what you feel is best. :3
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A
female
reader, 2sillyrabbits +, writes (16 December 2008):
We all have the perfect stereotype of males. We all need to test the waters. He just wanted to test them with you, don't be offended, as you had some great quality he needed. At the same time he is also testing himself. He needed to prove to himself that after having a great woman, he needed a man. Be proud you were that woman to help him. Set him free and find some that deserves you.
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