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My boyfriend has been so supportive that I worry I'm becoming dependant on him.

Tagged as: Dating, Health<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (7 February 2013) 4 Answers - (Newest, 11 February 2013)
A female United Kingdom, anonymous writes:

I've been through a rough time recently, with depression and self harming. I've promised myself though that I won't ever hurt myself again and am currently not as depressed or low in mood as I have been compared to last week. The thing is, I've been relying a lot on my boyfriend as of late. When I was at work he traveled for hours just to stay with me and make sure I'm ok, which is amazing of him. But I feel bad for having to depend on him so much to stay afloat, especially since my self harming has greatly upset him. I refuse to talk about anything related to that anymore so that I don't upset him again. In fact, I told him very recently that I needed space because I feel like I've been too dependent, so I said I didn't want to see him or speak to him for a while. Instead I've been trying to get on with my life, pick up hobbies I stopped doing and to see people I had stopped really seeing.

Am I doing the right thing by trying to stand up on my own two feet and be more independent, or am I being a bit silly to reject the support I have considering what I've just been through and am still going through? I hate hurting him more than anything else but am scared to become overly dependent, but at the same time I wonder if by suddenly cutting contact that I'm too quickly and suddenly removing someone who keeps me going.

Would greatly appreciate your advice, thank you.

I'm 21 years old.

View related questions: at work, depressed

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A male reader, Silius Sodimus Australia +, writes (11 February 2013):

In the end you always need to look out for number 1 because no one else ever will. Having said that don't just toss him away, it sounds like he cares deeply and prob has more patience than alot of guys I know. I don't think you should get rid of him, if he want's to be there let him stay BUT patience is always limited so I would suggest doing something that will help you, whether it's medication, psychotherapy, meditation whatever it is you think will help.

Meds can be hit and miss, you may need to try several different meds before hitting the right one, but once you do it can be a lifesaver. I personally don't think meds should be used for life but if it's the only thing that keeps you "normal" then it's better than trying to battle it out with yourself every day.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2013):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

It doesn't really matter as the rash has gone now so I can continue with the one I have... and anyway, antidepressants have many side effects as you'll know. I'm just getting my head around these side effects let alone bombarding myself with new ones.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2013):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I have done and it was the doctor who told me to stop taking it, but didn't offer me an alternative.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2013):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Hi, yes, thanks for your answers. I am seeing a therapist and was taking anti depressants until lately (had bad rash reaction so stopped for a bit) but I'll start again once it's gone.

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