A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:When me and my boyfriend have sex, he can't last for longer than about 15-20 minutes before he comes. And then that's that. He apparently has such a long refractory period that having sex again isn't worth it and doesn't feel as good - until the next day!When he's finished, he usually gets really sleepy as well, so isn't in the mood for any more fun. The problem is, sex just doesn't last long enough, and always leaves me feeling unsatisfied :(I've tried talking to my boyfriend about this, but he says that it's not his fault he comes so quickly and that he takes so long to recover. Which I suppose is true!What can I do? I feel really upset and guilty, like it's my fault for accusing him.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (9 February 2009):
 Satindesire is absolutely right. Keep 4play going longer to make you satisfied before he becomes satisfied.
It's called hyper focus. Those who last for hours are not thinking about you when they're doing it. They're thinking about work, or grandma in ugly panties. This allows them to sustain.
Your boyfriend apparently is keeping his eye on you. Which from that aspect, he may be quick, but his mind is in the right place.
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