A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:HiMy bf fought with me couple of days back, because i called him twice when he was hanging out with his friends. After that I didn't call him and neither did he.Today he sent text, saying sorry for his shouting at me and i didn't respond to his text. He called me and left me a voice mail. But in the voice mail he said "Hi XXX i am really sorry for hurting u", but the problem is my name is not XXX, its not my nick name and i don't even know anyone named XXX.What should i do now? Should i confront him or just ignore his calls and break up with him. BTW he often ignores me and always makes excuses for not calling or coming over to my place often. Please help
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female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (20 May 2012):
 The 'XXX" is an actual woman's name, not a generic nickname like 'pumpkin' or sweetheart', correct? If that's so then I wouldn't read anything into that alone. Over the years I've called people by the wrong name on a number of occasions and had the same done to me (my mum is notorious for it).
To be honest, I can understand him being annoyed at you calling him twice while he's out with friends. That is very clingy, not to mention very rude (to his friends), and I'm certain whatever it was you wanted to say to him could have waited.
In light of the above my guess is he ignores a lot of your calls or texts simply because you send so many of them. This would irritate anyone.
It may be that you two are either incompatible or the relationship has run it's course, but it might be a bit premature to jump to that conclusion.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (20 May 2012):
 Do you still have the voice mail? If so play it to him and tell him you found that rather odd.
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A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (20 May 2012):
 Maybe he had a sudden memory loss???, LOL
However, he doesn't sound like much of a boyfriend from what you tell us.
I recommend you speak to him about it - but in a non-combative way - and see what he says. You'll then be in more of a position to decide what you want to do about the relationship.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (19 May 2012):
 I don't know about the rest of your relationship. If you don't want to be with him any longer and you feel hurt often then maybe you should leave.
But, as for him calling you the wrong name I really wouldn't put any thought into it. People do that fairly often. Maybe he just recently spoke to someone with that name, or saw someone called that, and that's why he said it. It happens, and I never heard of it having any hidden meaning. Sure, if he got your name wrong during sex that'd suck, but this was just a voicemail. No big deal I say.
My mother just called my brother (her son) by her deceiced husbands name. There was no reason for it whatsoever (it happened just a few hours ago, these things happen kinda often). My grandmother frequently called me by the wrong name as well.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (19 May 2012):
 "Hi there, either you had a brain fart or there's something really weird going on. You left a voicemail for XXX, which of course, as you know, is not my name. I'm a LOT freaked out about this and maybe the best thing to do for both of us is to acknowledge it's not working out. I do care about you and wish you the very best."
It sounds as though he feels like you want more of his time than he can give and you feel very neglected. In a case like this I think it may be healthier to accept it's over than to force someone to do something they just aren't prepared or willing to do.
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A
female
reader, Starlights  +, writes (19 May 2012):
 Yeah speak to him find out why he called you some other name; that would bug me too!
I know voicemails are pesky sometimes the message is not even clear when people leave them.
I would confront him otherwise you will wonder. If you find out his answer is not trustworthy then break it off if you feel to do so.
However its best to speak to him before making a drastic decision.
Goodluck!
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