A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hello loves.i adore this site, and leave feedback/advice quite often...and since i have h$ung around for so long,admiring all the wonderful advice i read dialy...i figured maybe some of you can help me with my problem for once...see here is the thing.me and my boyfriend have been together for three years now...and i honestly do think i love him.okay, correction, i know i love him...its just that here lately, there isnt as much between us.and i dont mean any of that in a sexual way...up until here recently, arguing was something we rarely did...but seems like now we are constantly at each others throats. he has a problem with the way my family treats me, (as if we are children), and that is totally understandable, but seems like all he ever wants to do is run it into the ground. which actually makes me feel depressed.but when we are together, he acts as if everything is fine and dandy...and thinks that the very second we are alone, the clothes should come off. crazy eh?and then there is this guy, who is actually one of my very best friends...and here lately, he has been treating me like a total princess. tells me all these sweet things, sends me messages for no reason, and even comes by my workplace where i waitress just to be able to spend time with me...and sad thing is--i love every second we spend together...whether we are just talking or hanging out by the pool.so the question is:-what should i do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2008): I think that you should look at the reasons why your bf is bringing up these fights. Is he concerned about the way your family treats you because he cares or is he taking the piss and just critisizing for no reason! He may be truly concerned about you. I also have to add that no relationship can ever not have arguments... I think that it is a natural phase all people go through. Sometimes a good argument to air issues and concerns is very necessary! Obviously if they are pointless ones then that is not good. You have spent two years with this guy, try to resolve it before you look to someone else. Talk to him calmly and tell him you are tired of arguing! Good luck xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks, ireplacement/i.
if things were only that easy...
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A
male
reader, Replacement  +, writes (24 July 2008):
 This is classic, you're unhappy in your current relationship so this unfamiliar guy looks even better than he usually would, and you start to develop feelings for him.
Anyway the solution: Either solve the problems you two have together or leave him. There's no point sticking around in a miserable relationship.
Also remember that this other guy might not be as perfect as he seems, you're vulnerable and upset right now. Don't dump your boyfriend to hook up with this other guy... you might end up disappointed.
Talk to your boyfriend, in a calm and controlled manner (avoid yelling), Tell him your position, express yourself clearly and concisely and let him know that the problems are becoming too intense for you. See if you two can work it out and if not... I guess it's over.
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