A
female
age
51-59,
*ichellelee913
writes: My boyfriend accusses me of cheating everday,ive never and wld never cheat but really he is ruining what we have. I love him but im tired of defending myself it is making me physically sick! What do i do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2012): get out before he destroys you no man is worth this much heartache
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (29 June 2012):
 I agree with everything said already, just wanted to add something else.
Often times when someone is irrationally afraid their partner is cheating, it is because they are cheating themselves.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (29 June 2012):
 If he accuses you EVERY DAY and you have never given him a reason to question you, then I’d consider that he’s not balanced mentally and you might want to end the relationship.
IT could be that he’s cheating or considering it.
It could be that he’s just totally insecure
He could be mentally ill and paranoid….
If it’s constant and chronic and making you ill, you need to end the toxic relationship. Easier said than done I know… but he’s creating a self-fulfilling prophecy with his behavior. He says “women always cheat on me and leave” but then when you don’t, in order to prove to himself that you are, he pushes you away…
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (29 June 2012):
 I agree with the "Aunties" and "Uncle" Fatherly Advice. He does it to keep you in line, make YOU work extra hard trying to prove that you are faithful and loving to him only. Keeping you off center with his accusations you are more worried what HE thinks that listening to your own gut and follow YOUR instincts.
Could even be that HE is cheating. You know the saying offense is the best defense? So accusing you makes him seem morally superior, even though he isn't.
I would tell him it's time for him to quit the accusations and trust you or leave. Personally, I would be more inclined to leave, as this behavior of his is NOT going to stop, specially since he uses it for manipulation and since it drains you and makes YOU physically ill.
Doesn't that sound toxic to you?
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (29 June 2012):
 Great answers, Not sure I know why I feel the need to chime in here.
Constant accusations are a form of verbal / emotional abuse. He is doing it to keep you off balance and submissive. Nasty and insidious method of playing the victim while in fact victimizing you.
The previous answers, projecting, insecurity, or weed, are equally possible. In the end you feel the same way, defensive, sick, and used.
Time to make a break. All relationships are relationships of trust, without trust there is no relationship.
FA
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (29 June 2012):
 Does he smoke weed? I just would like to know before I answer.
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A
female
reader, Candycane1234 +, writes (29 June 2012):
 Why would he think you're cheating, I'd investigate to see if he's cheating.
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