A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi. My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year. His best friend, someone he's known since he was little, will not stop hitting on me. He openly asks to have sex with me, asks to see me naked, and to have threesomes with his girlfriend -- and he does all of this in front of his girlfriend and my boyfriend. It makes me very uncomfortable. I've spoken to my boyfriend about it and asked him to say something. His response: "That's just how he is, ignore it." Honestly, I've tried, but I can't stand it anymore. The best friend is scum already (drug problems, unemployed), and this just heightens how much I dislike him. How do I make it stop if my boyfriend won't?
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male
reader, leonard j.Douglas  +, writes (9 August 2007):
Your bf has been told that his friend needs to go, but he won't do anything about it. So why don;t you do what your heart is telling you to do. Get rid of both of them. they both sound like losers, and if you stay with them so will you end up a loser. Get out of that dead-end relationship,PDQ. Lots of luck. You can do a hell of alot better then the both of them.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2007): Your boyfriend's a jerk. He should come to your defense and not let guys especially those close to him disrespect you. If I were you I'd find a new boyfriend.
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A
female
reader, skye  +, writes (9 August 2007):
 I understand how you must be feeling. No wonder you are uncomfortable around him, especially when your boyfriend refuses to help. Tell him that you find his friends remarks unacceptable, that you have tried ignoring him yet he still continues and you refuse to be in his company any longer. It is sexual harrassment. Hopefully this will make your boyfriend sit up and take notice of his pals behaviour.
Your boyfriend should not be happy for any man to treat you in this way despite their personal problems and should agree to you distancing yourself from him. Ask him to help his friend get his life back on track by trying to convince him to go to rehab and through time help find a job. Otherwise, I cant see why your boyfriend would want to stay friends with this man. "Old times" just isnt enough to justify his friends behaviour.
Tell your man that you have respect for yourself even if he doesnt and will not put up with this any longer. Tell him that you expect him to try to help his old friend otherwise you will leave this destructive circle. Be firm, but calm so that he knows you are serious...and if you have to, DO IT! Its better you get yourself away from this situation than loose your self worth.
Take care,
Skye.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2007): Your boyfriends needs to be aware. This situtaion happend to a friend of mine and he dont abused my him.Tell your bf that it needs to stop.If you want to stop it yourself infront of your bf n the other boys gf, tell him to stop hitting on you, you are uncomfortable and dont like it.See how this goes if not please please go to a family memeber if worse comes to worse tell your bf you are not going out if he is going with hes mate because thats how un-happy you are around him. Please keep very aware around him.
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A
female
reader, lisa kathleen gates +, writes (9 August 2007):
 put your foot down. tell the boyfriend... i wont see you whilst he's around. end of. he'll soon take the hint that you dont like him and his mate will have to change sooner or later. you dont wanna give your bf too much of an autimatum (cant spell) u just want to show your feelings about how much this chap annoys you. i would tell the bf u dont wanna c this mate of his n u will walk out of the house or room if he turns up unexpected, the scarey thing is if the best mate is doing drugs the chances of your beloved bf doing them r pretty high. do you want to be associated with a load of druggies? i didnt.my ex was best mates with a heroine adict, it soon ended us, but admitedly it took 14months, hense... ex.dont fall into a trap because of what your heart is telling you, because you will only get hurt, this is one for your brain im afraid hun. x x x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2007): I think you should get away on that kind of person.He's not respecting you.You should not ignore what he's doing to you.You can do it.Be yourself.
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