A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Should I finish with my boyfriend?I planned with my boyfriend to do something this weekend for our 5 year anniversary. But then he got invited to a stag-do weekend, so we cancelled it. I thought at least we can spend valentines together, but then he forgot and planned to leave early for the stag do. He could have changed this and gone tomorrow, but he asked me if I cared and I said no, mainly because he said only silly women care about things like valentines. I told him that he should enjoy the trip, but he took it the wrong way and it started a fight.I feel like he never compromises for me, that I can never discuss things with him because he makes me feel like I am being a silly wingeing girl. I love him but how can it work if I cant talk to him? Whenever we fight it often ends with him saying we should split and why do i put up with him?Feeling sorry for myself
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female
reader, hannieseds  +, writes (14 February 2007):
 Hi there,
I agree with the first poster. You didn't say you weren't happy with all of this! You HAVE to communicate your feelings with him! You said you planned to do something special on your 5-year anniversary, but if he had known how important that was to you, I doubt he would have put the stag-do first, you see what i mean? Men can't read our minds so you have to talk to him and talk simple! None of this swimming around your point or thinking he should be able to know what you're thinking, you just have to put it out there for him plain and simple.
Don't split with him, 5 years is a long time so don't just throw that away on an obvious communication issue. Once you tell him how important things like this are to you - the romantic side of things - your anniversary and Vdays, then in the future he will know what you expect of him and he will hopefully choose to spend your anniversary with you instead of his friends!
You'll have to let this one go though because he has already arranged it all. Maybe have a big talk with him when he gets back and get all of your feelings out in the open. Don't fret love, things will be okay! xxx
A
female
reader, melschatbox  +, writes (14 February 2007):
 Well, honey the last thing you want to do is "pick" a fight right before your b/f goes away for the w/e with the guys. I understand where you are coming from, he should've considered your feelings more than his buddies. But, here's what I think ya did wrong. When he asked you if you cared...you should've said, YES! YES, I do! See, here's the problem ....if we gals don't set a precedent for Vday....then it just seems to all go downhill from there. Does your b/f love you regardless if it's Vday or not? Of course he does...But, on this special day it's meant for couples. Just ask the ones that are single...how they feel about Vday?.... Best wishes
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