A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years, we really love each other and have never had any bad patches. Then he went out one night and got really drunk and kissed another guy, who was his close friend. He says he can't actually remember this, but has been told he did it. He has had experiences with guys in the past, but had decided it wasn't for him. Now this has come out of the blue for us both. I don't know whether to stay with him as I really want to work this out, or whether I'm just going to get hurt more in the long run. He has been extremely remorseful, but says the fact that he did it makes him wonder whether he has suppressed sexual desires for men. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!!
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female
reader, AskEve +, writes (18 March 2007):
Sit down with him when you are both relaxing and ask him what it is about men that turns him on. Try and get him to open up to you. When was his first experience with a man? How did it make him feel? Does he miss it? What did he like the best about being close to a guy? Has he ever been intimate with a guy? If so, did he go the full way and actually have sex? All these questions will help him open up to you and you'll know by his response how he feels about it all.
After doing that and depending on his replies, you will need to decide whether or not the relationship is worth continuing or in fact has run its course.
Eve
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2007): It's possible that he has hidden sexual desires for men. It's also possible that he did something stupid when he was drunk and now sincerely regrets it. Alcohol makes people do crazy things. I think the only option is for you two to have a long chat about it. Ask him if he DOES have any desires for men, if he's gay, etc. If he isn't, I see no reason to break up - he did something stupid under the influence, and probably just wants to move on.
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