A
female
age
30-35,
*o_in_love
writes:My best friend of 15 years has been going out with this guy for 2 years almost. In that time she's cheated on him God knows how many times, last time I got her to tell him because I thought it wasn't fair on him and she did, but got mad at me telling me not to get involved.Now she's cheated on him again with someone else and I don't know what to do.. I feel tight on him.. But I might loose her as a mate if I get involved again, plus she's right.. Its none of my business.What should I do??xxxxx
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2007): Firstly, he may end up believing her and resenting what he see`s, as you trying to break them up.The saying god moves in mysterious ways is true. He will sooner or later find out for himself.
A
male
reader, GreenTea  +, writes (2 August 2007):
He wont believe you. She will hate you. But in the end he will come around and thank you. She may not be your friend much longer.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2007): I don't think you should directly tell him, maybe set her up to get caught some how. Make yourself look innocent and that she got caught on her own some how. If that's possible. If not, then let time run it's course. She'll get caught. But why is he with her still if she told him she cheated last time?
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A
male
reader, Uncle Trev +, writes (2 August 2007):
It depends how close you are to the boyfriend that has been cheated on. If you are particularly close to the girl in question and not to the lad then maybe it would be a good idea to stay out of it. If he is a good friend then I would be inclined to tell him but drop hints as opposed to coming right out with it. Does she hang out at certain places with the other guy? |Maybe you could tell him that you saw her with someone and wondered who he was?I think at the end of the day you have to put yourself into two situations - If you were your friend would you want (You) to say something? and if you were the boyfriend would you want (You) to say something?I wish you luck with this one - something needs to be done so you have to go with your instincts here and do what you believe to be right. In telling you would lose your friends trust though and it is because of this that I think the best way to go around this would be to drop the guy some hints and let him work it out for himself.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2007):
If you ask anyone who has been cheated on, one thing they always say is how they feel utterly betrayed by those who knew about it but never said anything. It's a horrible feeling knowing that everyone seemed to know about it apart from you!
I think this guy will really appreciate you for telling him. He probably won't at first, he might not even believe you, but one day he'll look back on all this and he'll be glad it was you who had the guts to speak out when everyone else gossiped about it but did nothing.
You'll be doing him a massive favour, and, to be honest, you might not even loose the friendship either because she probably knows what she is doing is wrong and that you are doing the right thing - albeit on her behalf.
All the best with whatever you decide to do though!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2007): I think that you should tell him. It's so hard being in his shoes. I went through that. It's better if your friend does not find out who told him. So u should tell him if he keeps his source secret.
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (2 August 2007):
 Its none of you're business although if it was me and my friend had proof he was cheating on me i'd want to know, so i could slap him then walk away lol. I know you're friendship is important but you have to make a decision on telling the truth or keeping quiet. I know what i'd do but its you're choice hunnie hope this helps xx A
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A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (2 August 2007):
 Stay out of it. You know she will get found out eventually. Its rare not to if they are habitual cheaters.
I wouldnt tell him. People dont always thank the messenger.
It is her business really. Its not right, but ultimately her business.
C xxxx
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