A
male
age
30-35,
*enfuller
writes: hey everyone,i need some help!i really, really like this girl, i have for about a year and never been able to tell her but ive dropped hints for ages, we are really close, and she just broke up with her boyfriend. I was at a party which she really wanted me to go to, so i thought she liked me and that i could finaly tell her there, but when i was there she hardly talked to me the whole night and later on i found her with one of my best mates 'snuggling' on the couch (he doesnt know that i really like her).What should i do, i still want to be mates with him, and i still really like her, but they like each other and i know it's only a matter of time before they start seeing each other...should i talk to him about it?
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male
reader, Griim +, writes (23 April 2009):
I have been in this kind of situation before and so I think I can offer you some insight into your situation.
First and foremost please remember, whatever happens, it is not the end of the world. There is no such thing as THE love OF your life, just A love IN your life. There are over 6,000,000,000 people on this planet, of which you have only met the tiniest minority, believe me, there are plenty more people you can love and who will love you back. One of them might be this girl, but it might not. Keep that in mind.
Secondly if you're anything like me you will be afraid of stepping on your friends toes to get to this girl. Don't be. Do anything you want to try and get closer to her and don't for one second think you are betraying him or causing him any distress, he will return the favour. Don't take it personally. You could try asking him to back off but I don't think its a good road. I wouldn't recommend it. Besides the only persons feelings you are interested in now is hers.
Thirdly make sure your intentions are clear. You do not want a friendship with this girl, you want to date her. Flirt at every available opportunity. Don't dismiss other girls either, if other girls are interested then it gives her a reason to be interested too.
Make sure to write back and keep us updated!
Good luck! (And remember, its not the end of the world!) ;)
A
male
reader, Love4Life +, writes (22 April 2009):
You have a very touchy situation. You need to talk to your friend and see if he seriously likes this girl or not. If he does you have a choice to make. You can go to this girl tell her how you feel or not. Ask your self is this love or lust. A good friend is hard to come by. Sometimes we have to give up what we want the most. Their will be other girls out their to make a connection but if hes a good friend I would not risk it. A true friend is a rare and precious thing. If your a true friend you will know that not every one we call a friend can be trusted with our better half. You are a man you know we are dogs by nature and have to fight to be good men. Just remember talk to your friend tell him how you feel and tell him if he is really interested you wont stand in his way but if not he now knows how you feel and if hes a friend he'll let you have a chance at a love connection.
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A
female
reader, keely-h +, writes (22 April 2009):
i feel for you,i know what its like but come clean to your freind on the phone or in person you must tell them its better to be safe then sorry.she might of " cosyed" up to your freind cause she felt upset about her break up.
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A
male
reader, fuglyone +, writes (22 April 2009):
You've got a few choices. First, and what I would have done is jump in with them and snuggle with them. Why not? Talking to him about it is just going to become a "I saw her first" mess. Who needs that? Second choice, is to just be dumb and honest and do what you want when you want, which is another thing I'd do. Do what you want. Not what a bunch of know-it-alls, who think they know how things should go, tell you.
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