A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am a single mum. My baby's dad walked out when she was only 19 weeks old due to me finding out he had been cheating on me, for how long I have no idea but I was crushed.I have been single for almost a year now.I know I am not the first female to have been in this situation but it hit me hard. I have suffered depression and stress and it doesn't look as though there is any light at the end of the tunnel.I haven't been on a proper bight out since I found out I was pregnant all of my friends seem to have moved on without me obviously now I can't go out when I feel like it as I need to find a babysitter and plan in advance.I feel there is no hope for me to ever be in a relationship again. I have honestly hit rock bottom now. baby weight is still on me and I don't have any 'me' time anymore.Is there a small glimmer of hope out there for someone like me?
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female
reader, largentsgirl89  +, writes (2 March 2011):
 Congrats on becoming a mom, it's the most awesome club in the world.
Don't despair. I am 21 years old, I had my son when I was 19 and he is the best person to ever arrive in my life. I felt exactly the way you did right now. Depressed, I can't have a life of my own anymore, what am I going to do? I have no money or a place to live. My son's father was truly never there for me or my son and he died in June of 09 from getting drunk and falling off of a roof.
I have a new man in my life we will call him "Michael" and he loves my son as his own and he loves me more than I thought was possible for me. He treats us well and takes care of us. He and I are expecting our first child together and we find out next week what we are having. Everything that I went through led me to where I am and I couldn't be happier.
I know it's hard to think about right now, but you will make new friends that have children of their own and you can have play dates! Yay. You will find someone who is going to be so good to you and your daughter that you won't believe it. I know it's hard to see it now. As for working off the baby weight (hardest weight to lose ever!) you can do simple things throughout the day. Dance with your daughter. My son loves to exercise because I worked out with him.
There is so much out there waiting for you and your daughter. Be happy with who you are. Enjoy your daughter, time really does fly and eventually you will find someone who is worthy of your time.
Good luck to you and congratulations again on becoming a mother.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2011): Yes, there is hope. Don't despair. As you say - you are not the only person in this situation. You sound depressed and that puts a negative slant on everything. You could be suffering from post natal depression and you should talk to a health visitor or doctor. It is very common to suffer in this way and people will be sympathetic. You are also getting over your partner leaving you. Is he stepping up to the plate and at least supporting by looking after the baby from time to time? He should be, to give you a break. Even if he has just totally gone, you have to put yourself first as your baby needs a healthy, well adjusted Mum. Get help, look for support groups where Mums meet up, see your doc about depression. But whatever you do don't give up, you will be ok in time.
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A
female
reader, StarryEyes101 +, writes (2 March 2011):
 Glimmer of hope yes. I'm 20 with a 3yr old and without her life would be bleak. If it wasn't for her smiles in the morning i'd be so depressed. I left the guy, before I even had the baby coz he was bad news and I knew i wouldn't want someone like him in my life or my baby's. As for your ex, leave him there. If he cheated on you, he would do it again. And he did it while you hadn't long give birth to his child?? Not on.As for your friends. They are not really good friends. They know you have a child and can't do things like you could before. I think you should join some groups (parenting, single mothers) there are loads of them. And yes, there are a lot of single dad's out there too, so I don't think you'll have a problem in finding another guy. Don't feel sad about all of this. You still got your baby =)I hope this helps x
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