A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:my boyfriend of 1 and half years, told me that he wanted to be just friends with benefits, i agreed as i still love him, and it was a way for me still to see him. i cannot bare the thought of not seeing him, and i am hoping that he realizes somewhere that he wants to be with me as a boyfriend again. he tells me that he loves me and that nothing will change the way he feels about me. so why does he want to be fwb? will he ever change his mind?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2009): It depends on what you want. If you are o.k. with 'just sex' relationship go for it, but it sounds like you are bending just to have him in your life. That makes it an unhealthy attachment to man. It will bring you a lot of sorrow in a future. I am confident that fwb is solely men's creation. No woman would ever want to have a relationship like that. We, girls, created differently.
So, my opinion, is not to let him get away with this convinient arrangment for him. Do what suits YOU, first you need to take care of yourself, do what makes YOU happy.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (3 January 2009):
 You are going down the road to misery. Tell this guy that he can take his FWB and find another sucker. See him for the person he truly is and that will help you get over the pain of breaking away. Know that you are worth so much more and that you will find the man who will actually be a man you can love AND respect. Good luck, honey, trust me, you'll be glad you did.
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A
male
reader, NITRAM BLUE  +, writes (3 January 2009):
 Words are just words, girl. You should know that.
To love and to hold. Till death do we part. - are phrases but do they really mean anything? Words are just words. When divorce comes what happened to those sacred phrases?
There is nothing permanent in this world but change.
FWB - just friends, not lovers? So he is free as a bird arrangement. But you are hooked to him, that is the problem. The solution is to wake up. Wake up girl!
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A
female
reader, Sangoma  +, writes (3 January 2009):
 Face the facts. He is telling you stories. Eish, I know it hurst to face the reality, but fact it, he is using you. He gets the pleasure without the commimment or the pay. No stop, he has a bargain. It must not be like that. Dignity and selfrespect is the secret.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (3 January 2009):
I hate when men do this. They want to break up with a girl but still want to use them for easy sex.
Either that or he wants to be with you but wants to sleep with lots of other girls and this is basically a guilt free way of cheating on you, even though it is still going to hurt you just as much.
If you value your self respect or your sanity then you have to tell him that he can either be with you full time, or he can break up with you. He can't have it both ways.
It will be one the hardest things you may ever do emotionally but trust me, if you let him use you, hoping that he'll suddenly decide to give you love as well, it will break you. I have seen it happen.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
male
reader, roadman +, writes (3 January 2009):
 He may do...I think your playing this one correct..
Getting what you can get even when the chips are down.
Give it time he may want you a 100% as your the woman who lets him be himself and still keeps up friendship and contact..
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