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Mum pays more attention to sisters boyfriend than she does to me!

Tagged as: Family, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 June 2008) 4 Answers - (Newest, 5 June 2008)
A female age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I'm so angry and hurt!!

My sister is sick, she got some stomach virus from her bf. We share our bedroom. The thing is, she was very sick, and so was her bf. They've been dating for a month tops. And he's much older, she's 21 and he's like 31 or 32 I don't know. And just a few weeks ago my mom kept talking about how she doesn't like him. He's living on his own here, he's kinda new in town.

But since yesterday and today, it's all been about them! I can understand my mom being so worried about my sis, but about him???? Really? She made lunch for him, went visit him, gave him medicine, etc., even offered t pay for his treatment if needed! I mean gee, he's 32, he could very well go to the hospital (which he did) and now he's better, but, no!

Today in the morning, I was still sleeping and my mom bluntly entered the room, woke me up to talk to my sister and ask how he was doing, if he needed anything, etc... she didn't even look at me, or ask me how I was doing, no...

And then I was all bitter about it, so she confronted me and I told her that she was treating him like he was her son, and that she hadn't given me attention, and well that they've been together for a month tops... and what did she do? She got mad! She said I was immature and dumb, she told me that if my bf was living on his own she'd do the same. I told him my bf has nothing to do, I told her it was about her neglecting me over some guy she barely knows! Who's old enough to take care of himself anyway!

I know you'll probably agree with my mom, but I don't care, I just needed to get this out of my chest! Oh and also he comes here to visit my sister while he's still contagious and does my mom object? NO!!!!

Am I too immature or what?

View related questions: immature

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A male reader, Jamer70 United Kingdom +, writes (5 June 2008):

Jamer70 agony auntLike eyes said

Some mothers like to mother

some men like to be mothered

Though i took Wizs class in being a man, some men have yet to get the memo

If your over 18 i really doubt you need your mummy still and if your mum wants to mother this man let her its her life, she should cuddle who she likes

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (5 June 2008):

eyeswideopen agony auntWell maybe I should enrole my old man in the Wiz "How Not To Be A Wimp When You Have A Cold" school for a couple of semesters. sniffle,sniffle, waa, waa.

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (5 June 2008):

eyeswideopen agony auntJust to put a little perspective on this, I can guarantee you that a male, whether he's two or sixty-two, can be such a baby when he's sick. The same guy who laughs while he's getting stitches sewn into an arm or leg, will fold like a card table and cry for Mama with the stomach flu or low grade fever. I think maybe your mom knows this and since the guy is new in town decided to be his surrogate mother.

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A male reader, rcn United States +, writes (5 June 2008):

rcn agony auntLets erase the cause of. The attentions she spends with him, and taking care of a nonfamily member. What I want you to understand, your issue has nothing to do with him or your sister. It has to do with you. The lack of attention she is showing toward you.

Weather I'm taking care of someone who is sick, working, or anything else. All of my children still rely on me, not to just feel and house them, but to treat them as a member of our family. What was wrong was your moms reaction. You feel this way, no one has the right to say you don't or you shouldn't. She's not feeling the way you do at that moment. Saying your feelings didn't matter is wrong. This may not be an issue for her, but because it is for you, it's important to you, and should of been treated as such.

Take care, I hope all works out for you.

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