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female
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anonymous
writes: I'm 14. I feel im mature enough to be alone with a guy. My Mom never listens to me and just always tells me to leave her alone. I've tried to talk to her, but she just won't listen! She thinks I'm immature, irresponsible, and too young to be alone with boys. She won't even let me see my boyfriend! It's driving me crazy! I have no idea what to do. My boyfriend and I have been together for about 4-5 months and we have only seen each other a few times just because my parent will not let me see him. This is making me very depressed. When I try to prove I am mature and responsible she completly ignores it. When I try to talk to her about it, she will not listen to a word I say. All she does is walk away and says "leave me alone" or "quit bugging me". And I don't even argue, I speak as I should. She acts as if she is a teenager. It's ridiculous. I can't stand being locked up in my house all the time like this. Someone please help.
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female
reader, lildeesbg  +, writes (12 September 2005):
 Being 14 especially during this day and age is hard. Your mom has issues with you being alone with your boyfriend because she is scared that you two might "experiment" in sexual acts. Also the thought of a 14 yr old being alone with a guy just doesnt sit right with you mom, and who can blame here. It really isnt that she thinks of you as immature or irresponsible, its that your her daughter and she wouldnt feel right or look right if she let you be alone with a guy. Honestly, you have your WHOLE life to be alone with a guy.
However, if she is stopping you from seeing him altogether, then I can understand your fustration. If your mom doesnt want you to see him at all then you need to sit and talk with your mom. Tell her you understand about being alone with him, but how about a play date. I know the word "play date" sounds so third grade, but hear me out. Ask her if it would be ok, for him to come over your house while she is home and you and your boyfriend can watch movies on the couch or if he can eat over one night.
This is not an easy topic for your mom, you have to realize that your her baby no matter how old you get. Respect that she might not be ready to handle this. Instead of rebelling, do the opposite so it shows her that you really are mature and soon the privilages will start.
Dee =)
A
female
reader, lulu +, writes (12 September 2005):
although i can understand your point of view, i can see your mums too. i mean you are 14 and still a child to her. she thinks you are too young to date and maybe shes right, however she cannot stop you from feeling this way. you have lpenty of time for boys and should just be out for fun. however your mum does need to let you live a little and make your own mistakes otherwise youll resent her.
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A
male
reader, ive been there +, writes (12 September 2005):
well i totally understand what you mean. when i was your age i was going through the same problem. i never really understood why my mom acted like that but as time went on i figured out that she was afraid of losing her baby. she used to tell me that i was imature too, so i stopped giving her a reason to say that: i made sure that my room was always clean my grades were up and my chores were done with out her telling me to do them. i know its hard at times but when it was all said and done she had no reason to say i was immature and the privilages just started coming in. but as i sit and think back i realize that boyfirends or girlfriends come and go but my mom is still there. i love her so much and i am thankful she was the way she was.
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