A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Recently a friend met a theatre actress after a stage show she admired, and though the actress took a photo with her ( and even sent a tweet the next day,)she seemed rushed when she her and others and not interested in chatting There were not many people waiting to meet her. They were all waiting to meet the male star... she was very disapointed when she told me as she expected this woman, (who appeared friendly on social media and online, hey she even tweeted my friend back the next day to say thanks for saying hi after the show) to be friendlier in person.. this got me thinking.. should you meet people you admire? they are people too with bad and good days..! and feelings..! I told my friend to be grateful she met one of her admired people and that she was probably busy, meets a few people and just wanted to get home to her family, my friend was a little upset, it is Ok to be a little upset?and it is better not to meet those you admire for fear of having your expectations crushed.. after all we are all people.. thoughts? thankyou
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female
reader, boo22  +, writes (7 July 2015):
 Its not a way I would like to meet a famous person, stood outside a concert venue for example. I got stuck in an elevator for about ten minutes with Elton John years ago,that was a good way to meet a celebrity cos it was natural.
I would tell your friend to forget it, you just don't know what's going on in their lives x
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (7 July 2015):
 I agree with Aidan
Your friend thought a couple of "tweets" meant that SHE now KNOWS the actress and the actress gives a flying fart about her. IT doesn't.
Today's actors "WORK" social media, just like other people.
It's UNREALISTIC of your friend to think she now has some kind of special bond with the actress.
I can't even begin to imagine how exhausting it must be for actors today, the more well known they are, the less privacy they have. People think they OWN a piece of them JUST because they have seen their movies.
I have seen how people ACT on twitter when a character on a TV show doesn't do what a part of the "fandumb" wanted to see happen. They send HATE tweets, the mock them, they are rude and obnoxious, goading each other to get worse. And it makes me sad to see, because it's PATHETIC that people can't distinguish a CHARACTER on a TV show from a REAL person.
It is OK that your friend was upset, not in my book. She sounds just a little to self centered and entitled.
If you have EVER been to a comic con (or any other promotional event) you would see JUST how hard these actors work - and that is AFTER they are done shooting the movie/show)- and then you have fans who wants to take ridiculous pictures with them (so they can post them on social media).
I'm sorry, if I seem harsh - I just don't get how people these days can't seem to respect that there is ANOTHER human being in front of them. Yes, it's famous actor/singer/whatnot - but they ARE just human beings.
Just Enjoy their work, and LET them have their PERSONAL life to themselves.
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A
female
reader, Questing for Love +, writes (7 July 2015):
 When meeting celebrities/idols, things can go all sorts of directions. There's so many things that can affect the situation, like you said, they too have good and bad days, and if your friend caught the actress on a bad or stressful day, than the actress may have had to fake being happy to meet someone etc. Unfortunately that's easy to see through.However the reason why I don't think it's necessarily fair to be upset, (don't get me wrong though, I very well know that emotions are next to impossible to fight. You can't really control what bothers you and how it makes you feel) is that before meeting a person, you sort of make pre-judgments and assumptions. Yes a person may appear friendly online, but that may very well be because they don't want people to see the negative side of themselves and choose to ONLY show positivity. For example if your friend only knows this actress through what she shows online, then that's ALL your friend has to base her off of. Your friend then adds the rest in her mind saying, well if she's nice online than there's absolutely no way she could be mean in person. I don't know if I'm explaining my thoughts clearly. Basically if you put a person on a pedestal in your mind as this perfect person who can't do anything wrong, than you are setting yourself up for disappointment. I too have done this.The people I admire are usually singers, and there was one particular singer that I truly looked up to and greatly admired and I had seen absolutely nothing but kindness from him on social media and through accounts of others that had met him. However things changed when I saw him in person. I had bought front row tickets to see this group perform, and there were 6 singers all of who I really enjoyed seeing. I bought meet and greet passes where we would meet 3 of the 6 people after the show, but there was no way to know ahead of time which 3 it would be. Originally I was hoping with all my heart that the singer I admired most would be in the meet and greet. However when we got there and I saw the show and saw him onstage, (he was VERY close to the front row) I immediately changed my thought and actually starting hoping he wouldn't be there. I got the strangest sense that he wasn't interested in meeting people and was possibly having an off-day. I don't necessarily know why I felt that way, I'm sure he would have been extremely kind, but something just seemed off. I still do admire him, but not quite in the way that I originally did. It turned out that he wasn't one of the meet and greet participants, thank god, but even meeting the 3 that were there was simply different than what I thought it would be. They were all kind and very friendly, but one of them seemed a bit like he was ready to leave and just get on the tour bus and relax, and honestly I didn't blame him as it was already very late at night.My dad had a similar situation. While in New York, he saw a man that was on a popular tv show out pumping gas at a gas station. So my dad went up to say Hi, but immediately sensed that this tv personality didn't really want to be acknowledged or bothered, so my dad quickly just said "Hey, I really like your show and just want to say Hi, have a good day" and left. Didn't ask for a picture or an autograph or anything of the sort, just said Hi and respected the man's boundaries.People are different in person and it's best to just go with the flow of the situation when meeting them. If that means accepting some rushed conversation and short answers from them, well then it happens. I guess to make a long story short, if you know you might meet someone you look up to, try to go in it without any expectations. Simply say hi, and if the person opens up for more conversation great. If not, say thank you for taking the time to say hi and leave. But don't take their reactions quite to heart, because you simply don't really know them or what they may be going through.
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A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan +, writes (7 July 2015):
Interesting question. Your friend was probably a bit unrealistic in her expectations as it sounds like the actress was friendly enough to me. As for meeting people you admire, the question is whether you have truly figured out who they are as a person. If your expectations are really high and you can only think of good things to say about them, you’ll probably be disappointed. If you can point to their flaws before you meet, then your expectations will have been realistic in the first place and, hopefully, it won’t be a shock.
I wish you all the very best.
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