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male
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anonymous
writes: Hi everyone I've been in a relationship now for 8 great months, and I mean great. We get on well. Never had a cross word and basically I have never been in a relationship like it before, when I've been made to feel so wanted.But now, over the past month, I am beginning to have my doubts and I'm begining to feel suffocated. The reason why is when we go out there is rarely a time when we can be just together. And I'm begining to resent this.The reason being is his mates is always there (male and female). Some of them even have my phone number and if they want to arrange something with us I never get a look in; they go straight to him and I'm supposed to just toe the line.This weekend, for example, arrangements has been made by his mates for us all to go out together and we had a brief chat. I said I wasn't really interested. Next minute it's all booked up and I'm supposed to go.I feel like I'm just supposed to put up with it because when I mention half a word I get the old blackmail trick thrown at me. I really love him. I have never had feelings for anybody like this before. And I know he truly loves me despite this.What should I do? Take time out from the relationship to give myself some time and hopefully during that time for him to see how it's affecting me? Any advice, good or bad, will be very gratefully received. :-) Thank you for taking the time to read this. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Country Woman  +, writes (20 May 2006):
 Have you ever had any time on your own with your guy at all?
If he truly loves you then he will see how much this is hurting you and tell him outright that you want some one on one time with him as you think it's great that he has a whole load of friends but you do need the odd times of special time together.
How long have you been together?
He sounds like he needs the security of his friends around him, is he completely upfront about his sexuality and does his friends know you are a couple?
Is he afraid of being alone with you as it is serious at those times, as it sounds like a fear of being completely committed to one person and having an army of friends around him means that things are always on a jovial level.
Friends are great but yes if you feel uncomfortable around them then go and see some of your own friends/family or have some me time for yourself.
Tell him you need to take stock of where you are at right now but don't cut off your nose to spite your face so to speak.
Just do the odd day or time so that he can see how much you are hurting right now.
He could be unaware of how much this is affecting you as some guys need it to be spelt out to them.
I hope some of the above helps in any small way and you can always come back and chat anytime OK, you are not on your own so don't feel that way ever.
Life is for the living and being miserable is just not productive. We are only here once and we have to make the most of it.
BFN
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