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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I had a few posts here and i appreciate the advice i got. This is my last post http://www.dearcupid.org/question/broke-up-with-ex-4-months-ago-and.htmIve been reading a lot about how to move on. I kept myself busy too, but its extremly difficult when im alone. I think about him every night before i fall asleep. Ive already forgiven him, but i didnt forget how much he hurt me and it stops me from contacting him. Hes once my bf and my best friend. If i could id take back our relationship so i could save our friendship. Im just so sad that i lost my best friend. I should just let go shouldnt i?
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male
reader, CMMP  +, writes (12 September 2013):
The greatest guy ever wouldn't have hurt you. Move on so you can find a guy who will be there for you when you need him most, because it's obviously not this guy.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (12 September 2013):
 If he hurt you so much, he was not that great of a friend was he ? Who needs friendships that HURT us ? friends are supposed to make our life happier, not shittier...
Give yourself time, 4 months FEEL like a lot but objectively it's quite a short time, to leave behind something that meant a lot to you. Keep doing what you are doing, ( being busy, seeing friends etc. ) and do not be surprised that the are moments of pain, loneliness ,longing. There is no magic potions to instantly numb your feelings, so don't try to shy away from them- just face them, handle them, knowing that 's it part of going through a loss and that eventually they'll fade away. They 'll fade away sooner if you decide to let go , in your mind and in your heart. I mean, keeping busy and doing stuff is excellent, but it won't help you much until you cling to nostalgic illusions like " If I could just resume our friendship ".
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A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (12 September 2013):
 Honey, its part of the grieving process, you need to keep busy and focus on everything other than the memories and the good that you remember in a relationship. If he was such a great friend, you would not be in this state. He has moved on, use that to say, if he can so can you. I promise you feel better, just don't push it and beat yourself up about it.
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