A
female
age
51-59,
*alybug2008
writes:Hello Everyone... I'm looking for some support. I posted in here on November 23 about spotting during first trimester pregnancy. A few days later I had a sonogram and saw the little peanut with its heart beating and everything was fine. The spotting stopped for a couple weeks. Then it started again on December 18th. I miscarried my precious peanut on December 19th. I was 12 weeks pregnant. It was the most horrendous experience I've ever went through. There was so much blood. I lost so much blood that I needed a blood transfusion to recover. But what hurts worse is that I never got to see my baby. For all I know I flushed it down the toilet! I feel TERRIBLE! I am so depressed and heartbroken!! I still feel like I'm pregnant and then I have to remind myself that I'm not and I break down. I'm currently taking Zoloft to help me out but I WANT MY BABY BACK!!! If anyone else out there that has UNFORTUNATELY gone through the same thing and would be willing to talk to me I would GREATLY appreciate it. I can't stop thinking about losing my precious baby. It's KILLING me. I feel so lost, sad, and empty. PLEASE HELP ME GET THROUGH THIS!!!
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female
reader, lalybug2008 +, writes (2 January 2009):
lalybug2008 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you both for taking the time to reply to my post. I sincerely appreciate it. Today is 2 weeks since I lost my precious peanut. The reality is still very hard to deal with. I find myself having to REMEMBER that I am no longer pregnant. I want the sadness, emptyness and depression to just go away. It's a new year..time for happiness and positive thinking..but I'm just not feeling it.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2008): Reading your message is completely making me cry, I feel for you. I never had a miscarriage but I had an abortion 3 years ago. And till this day I think about it. I killed my babies. The guilt is unimaginable but I had no choice. My mother had 2 miscarriages in her life. I remember when one of them happened. I was really young so I didn't really understand what was going on. They actually let us see the baby after they took it out. It was a baby boy. My mother was really hurt, but she's the type of person that doesn't like 2 talk about things, but don't be like that talk 2 your loved ones. I'm proud of you for choosing to seek support as I did. Please don't kill yourself like I do everyday, its only making things worse. I used to hurt myself physically after that happened, I wanted 2 die, I lost weight...etc. I don't want you to suffer like I did. Just remember that everything happens for a reason. My mother can barely afford to keep the lights on now because of the skyrocketing prices caused by the recession, if she had that baby, he would of been suffering. Sometimes we have days when we have NO food in the house and no money. I work but I barely make 150 a week now because they are cutting everyone's hours. I want to help but there isn't much I can do. Especially since I'm paying for school out of my pocket. Ghey claim my mom makes "too much money". She barely makes 30 a year after taxes, and we live in new york where the cost of living isn't cheap! They keep raising our rent and they raised our electricity bill by 40%. What's funny about that, is that no1 is ever home and when we are home my family goes to sleep, we're too tired from work and school. My mother is overworked and works 120 hours a week with no overtime because she's a manager. She can't afford 2 quit though because she doesn't have her citizenship card and stuff so she fears not finding another steady job. Well anyway, my point is, everything happens for a reason sweetie. I hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, chvyrdnck +, writes (24 December 2008):
first off i want to say sorry for your loss. i know how hard it is, i had a miscarriage in january at 15 weeks. it hurts alot but it will get better. im now 25 weeks pregnant and very happy. if you would like you can pm me anytime to talk and get some support. once again im so sorry for your loss.
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