A
female
age
41-50,
*osalyn Modica
writes:Hi,I have quite a sensative question to ask regarding loss of sex drive. I've known my husband for 7 years and have been married for 4. Unfortunatley through most of those 4 years I have had little to no sex drive. A lot of this was down to stress depression and loss of confidence but after sorting those problems I still seem to have no enthusiasim in the bedroom. My poor husband is getting more an more upset about this as I have not instigated sex more than 10 times in 4 years and have no interest past a kiss and a cuddle. I'm getting really worried as I don't want to push him away. I love him without a doubt but I just can't seem to get past this issue. Does anyone have any advice regarding this matter?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (16 April 2008):
Are you on the pill? Different pills can either boost or kill off your sex drive.
As you say you have been depressed, I would say this is probably the main cause of this.
You seem to see sex as something you should be doing for your husband. What you should be working on is forgetting the act itself, and finding ways to make yourself feel sexy.
Get a hair cut and a new lipstick. Make sure you put it on every day and wear something a bit nice. Feel pretty! Flirt with your husband, think about how gorgeous he is and how you first saw him and fancied him.
When was the last time you kissed you husband properly? Grab him in the kitchen or during the adverts on the TV and really really snog his face off. I find it such a turn on to surprise my husband with a big kiss and feel him melt and grab me tight.
You can always run off giggling afterwards. It's just about little thrills that make you feel alive again. Re-discover those butterflies you felt for him when you fist got together.
Good Luck!! xx
A
male
reader, salvation +, writes (16 April 2008):
i would say its down to stess and fear your stressing yourself about the sex and you might also be afraid deep down about if you can please him because you havent done it that much with him. Best thing is to talk to him about it. Good luck
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