A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Is there any male out there who was cheated on, but managed to work out your relationship? I'd love to talk to you about what happened. Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, LonelyElmo +, writes (6 February 2008):
Just found out that I've been cheated on. I'm trying to make it work, but I just don't know. It hurts. We've been married nearly twenty years. It came out of nowhere. I've been patient, angry, demanding and just about every emotion you can think of. I just don't know what's going to happen.
A
male
reader, LonelyElmo +, writes (6 February 2008):
Just found out that I've been cheated on. I'm trying to make it work, but I just don't know. It hurts. We've been married nearly twenty years. It came out of nowhere. I've been patient, angry, demanding and just about every emotion you can think of. I just don't know what's going to happen.
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A
male
reader, TomWilkinson +, writes (30 January 2008):
So your question is essentially... "I cheated and want things to work out still" personally I'd chuck you without a second thought. I've been cheated on and thought that we could work things out but instead it just bred bitterness and hatred
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2008): Why would you give her a second chance forget how attractive she is. her moral framework is flawed and this is engrained in her upbringing. How do you remedy that?
All the best
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2008): My first wife cheated on me within a year of marriage, we went on to have three kids. Then 13 years on she did it again. They say you learn by your mistakes, all she learned was how to be more devious. Now i have trust issues coming out my ears and am not much use to any woman, also I was forced to leave my children. I would advise no second chances if I were you, you have too much to loose, they have everything to gain, getting off the hook!
Good luck
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A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (30 January 2008):
A cheated male and a cheated female may not react the same way. What works in the male may not work in the female.
It is much easier for a man to forgive his wife than for a woman to forgive the husband.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (30 January 2008):
As a much older man (60), I've truly been in love just three times in my life, and married all three. Only the first one cheated (before) the marriage while I guess you could say we were engaged. I found out, she admitted it, and we married anyway.
But we were both only 17, and as people learn later in life, way to young to really even know what love and married are all about.
We later learned we were really not that a great match personality wise, and it ended. I later found out she had cheated once or twice during the marriage and was just glad to be rid of her.
The others, to the best of my knowledge and belief, never cheated but still too young the second time, and the third lasted 20 years. I was faithful during all three.
So, not a great solution here, but I will tell you that I would not have even tried to "work things out" if a wife strayed. It is betrayal of the highest order. Girlfriends have a bit more leeway.
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (30 January 2008):
I don't know too many people who haven't been cheated on at one time or another.
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