A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my boyfriend for over four years now. we have our ups and downs, but mainly its been ups. we only broke up once for like three days last summer and he realized how dumb he was a came back. Lately he has not been very affectionate and does not really seem to be excited to see me anymore. I love him so much still. I feel like there is a pattern in our relationship, last month we were amazing. Things were the best they have ever been and now all of a sudden he changed. This has happened a few times through out the years. I think he sabatoges himself when things get too happy, but usually we talk or i just back off a bit and he realizes he is dumb. I am afraid this is different this time because He mentioned once he thought we were too dependent on eachother but wouldnt talk anymore about it. And I think he is getting bored of being tied down, because he is now going to school after a long time off and making a bunch of new friends. I know he loves me, we have been through so much together. he had a really bad childhood and needed lots of help emotinally from me. I am afraid to talk to him about it because he may just get over this like usual and if i push him to talk about it, it could spur him to break up with me. I keep hoping he will go back to normal, its been about two weeks he has been acting like this. Also we were planning on living together in the summer, and i need to know if he is having second thoughts so i do not get stuck with no place to live. its just so hard, i love him so so so so so so much, and i know he loves me too. we have had such amazing times together and i still get excited to see him and am happy when he touches me. we have not been having much sex lately because we have both been so busy with school. could that be it? i know sex can really help improve a relationship. well any advice would be really appreciated. thanks
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female
reader, peach459  +, writes (11 February 2009):
Talk to him about it! It sounds like he's stressed out, or busy and distracted and unintentionally taking it out on your relationship. I think he would be upset to find out how much he's hurting you. Good luck!
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