A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm in love with a guy that I've been sleeping with off and on for 6 years. We've been friends for almost 9 years and I've always had really strong feelings for him, but not until recently did it get more serious for me. He is literally my best friend, but the intimate relationship has severely complicated our friendship. He lives 2 hours away and we don't see each other very often He says he cares about me immensely and that if we lived in the same town we would be together but he's made it clear that he won't commit because of the distant. I really question his true feelings and I see his sexual, inappropriate messages to other girls on facebook and everytime I read something new, it just kills me. I know I need to walk away, but I just don't know how or if I can. How do I let go of someone I love with all my heart?
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (22 April 2010):
 If he truly loves you I think he would have shown more respect to you and a certain level of committment even if he lives so far away. If he is your best friend how can he not understand that you go on facebook as well and read all these things? Or are you reading more into these facebook messages than whats really there?
Ask him if he wants you to move to the same town as him. If he truly loves you he'd want to be with you, so he should say yes (unless you have children or other committments in the town you already live in, or something similar).
I believe that true love is only between two people who love each other in return, and not a one sided love. What you experience may be more dedication than love, or obsession, if he is unwilling to go the same distance for you as you for him.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (22 April 2010):
If you don't walk away now, and cut him out, one day he will walk away from you and you'll be even more hurt. Sometimes we have to make difficult, hurtful decisions. But it's better than waiting around knowing that the inevitable will happen. If you want to end it, then you need to explain that you really do love him, but to get over him you need to cut contact. And you have to do it. The longer you leave it, the more broken hearted you are going to be when he does walk away.
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