A
female
age
30-35,
*unty Emily
writes:ladies,how long do you wait before you have sex with a guy-I'm confused because if you make them wait a long time,they may cheat and if you don't they may use you-what to do ?! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2009): firstly, if he likes you he will be willing to wait, and if he's not he's not worth it.
however, if your ready and you want to, your just not sure when, i'd say 2-3 months would be not to long not to short, but thats just me.
A
female
reader, AngellicaWaters  +, writes (28 September 2009):
 A decent man won't ever cheat on you and will respect your decision to wait to have sex with him until you have an established and secure relationship. That is what should determine how long you wait. If the kind of men you are meeting are not that kind of man, absolutely find better ones elsewhere. Once you know one another very well, are comfortable enough to discuss your current and future goals as individuals and as a couple, birth control and what would happen if that method failed and can trust one another enough to make that commitment, then it's time to consider sex. Otherwise you risk hurting yourself with unclear/differing relationship goals or by being used.If you make it too easy for men it will become a situation where you give man what he wants (sex) and you won't get what you want (love, respect, a relationship). You have to act in accord with what you want in order to get it. In order to get a relationship, you have to treat yourself and intimacy (sex) with you as if it's a huge prize to be earned. If a man will not take a long while to get to know you and form an attachment to you, you should not have sex with him unless you expect for it to turn into a causual and unfulfilling situation.Once you have this part of relationships down, it will be easier and easier to find men of better quality. A quality man will absolutely work to earn you.I hope this helps and wish you the best.-Angellica
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (27 September 2009):
I know I'm a guy and you were looking for females to answer this, but I thought a male perspective might be a bit helpful.
1). Wait as long as you feel comfortable with. A good guy won't pressurize you into anything you want to do. EVER!
2). If a guy ever cheats on you, he's not good enough for you, so forget him at all costs.
3). Get to know the guy over time before you have sex. Guys who use women have been known to play along, but most of the time, if they're desperate to use you, they'll do it sooner rather than than later. Again, you're too good and leave him instantly.
It's about whether you feel comfortbale or not, and whether the guy is actually any good. There are good guys out there, so take your time, get to know them and you'll find a nice guy who'll respect who you are. Lots of luck.
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A
female
reader, xAx +, writes (27 September 2009):
 Like others have been saying - if they love you they won't cheat.
I also researched this for myself and found that the average couple waits 4 - 8 months to have sex.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2009): i agree if he is really interested in you he won't cheat, plus he'll actually like that you made him wait that will show him that he actually means something to you and that you want more than just sex. There is no time limit but i would wait a little while, giving it up on the first or even second date might be a little early. You should wait until you're comfortable with him and if he's tempted to cheat then he's a loser anyway and you shouldn't waste your time with him.
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A
female
reader, unluckyme111  +, writes (27 September 2009):
its simple.... you do it when you know you are ready for it! and if you think he'll cheat if you dont, then you are better off without him. trust me!
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A
female
reader, supermum +, writes (27 September 2009):
 there is no such thing as a right time.... you will know when you feel comfortable with the idea.... and you obviously arnt at the moment.... so wait a bit... if he liked you, he wouldnt cheat, simple as....
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A
female
reader, Helples +, writes (27 September 2009):
 It doesn't really matter what other girls do since everyone is different... If you feel you want to have sex with him and you have a hunch he'll cheat on you, best not to do it and listen to your conscious. Your heart is the best advice anyone can give you. If it tells you to do it, and it knows you won't be hurt from this guy, then by all means do it. =)
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