A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have recently become engaged to my boyfriend of nearly two years, and everyone has wished us luck and congratulated us. We have decided to have a winter wedding as our birthdays are both near Christmas and everything was falling into place.But then my ex boyfriend sent me a text saying, "I hope you have a great wedding and I'm sorry that we never worked out. I wish it was us but I'm the one to blame. I hope that he treats you better then I did."He cheated on me at least three times that I know of, and he had a problem with drink at the time. We broke up and I met my fiancée within weeks of us ending. Nothing happened for about a year, he was a friend of my cousin's boyfriend and we met at a party, and stayed in touch.But now I can't stop thinking about this text message and what he thought it would achieve sending me it. It's not the first time he has spoken to me since we broke up, but nothing like that. I showed my fiancée and he said it was nice of my ex to say that, but I don't know, it's made me think that maybe it's one of two things. Either it's his way of having a dig at us for getting engaged and married within 5 months or he is genuinely sorry for his actions. He was my first and apart from my current relationship, the only serious relationship I had ever had at the time. It took a lot for me to move on and now three years down the line I feel like I'm back at square one. He sent the message 3 days ago, and I never replied but part of me wants to....would it be a bad idea? And what would you all think if you were me?
View related questions:
broke up, cheated on me, christmas, cousin, engaged, move on, my ex, text, wedding Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Brokenv  +, writes (3 August 2014):
We are always wanting what we can't have. Forget the message. You are happy with your new life and looking forward to the future with your husband to be. you broken up for a reason. Remember that.
If you truly don't love your guy. Let him go and don't play a game.
Good luck!
A
male
reader, Dodds  +, writes (3 August 2014):
 I would let it go if I were you but it seems you still have feelings for him. Don't punish your boyfriend by marrying him while still with unresolved feelings for another man.
What if he is genuinely sorry, would you call the wedding off?? Coz that's the impression am getting. And you know what? If you go back to him probably he'll cheat on you again, but maybe you wanna take that chance. Make up your own mind as I feel you already know what you want to do.
If you were over him you wouldn't care with way about that message. You'd be indifferent, but here we are!! Be smart yet true to yourself.
Good luck and best regards
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2014): Do not contact him.
Block him on your phone and social media.
Why let this piece of scum detract from your happiness?
Don't worry about why he did it or what could have been. That's his own problem. He screwed up. You found someone better. HIS loss. YOUR win.
Do you regret breaking up with him? Do you wish you were marrying him instead of your fiancé?
I'm hoping the answer is no in both cases. If it is then focus on your fiancé and let the other guy alone. Focus on your life!
...............................
A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (3 August 2014):
 He just wants to see if you still have feelings for him in your reply. If you reply that's because you want to find out if he had any remorse. I would not contact him because even though you ended in bad terms, it was still a serious relationship. The conversations could go on and on, when you should be focusing on your wedding. He might try to sound sincere just to get you to keep messaging back. I would not take the chance because you could be creating trust issues in this relationship. I would leave the past in the past.
...............................
|
