A
female
age
41-50,
*abbey
writes:Just ending a long painful relationship where I was verballyAbused and mentally as well.My ex said I was terrible in bed and I couldn't kiss wellAnd said I was boring in bed but he bugged me for sex allThe time.So now that the relationship is over I don't know where toBegin to have a new sex life. I am terrified. Scared toEven kiss a man. I was faking orgasms for so long I don'tEven know if a man could give me one. The ex never could.I can do it myself but where is the fun in that.HELP AND ANY ADVICE PLEASE!
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female
reader, agneeman  +, writes (21 March 2009):
 And the irony is HE'S THE ONE WHO WAS CRAP IN BED!!! How can you not know how the rship is over? he was simply not good enough for you thats how!!! And the bugger has ruined your self esteem- I'd be angry at you for allowing it if I didn't feel so bad for you girl who the F does he think he is?
Is hard to feel worthy of love when someone is trying all the time to make you feel worthless. If there's any one who needs to read HJNTIY its you!!
I'd suggest some time off guys. The most sacred part of your intimate self has been sacriligeously abused. Its time to start focusing on you... Doing something to get you in touch with your emotional self and loving your body again. You'll only overcome this when you get over His Royal Crapiness-es lies!!!
No man has the right to make you feel unattractive, you hear me?
Do what ever it takes to remind yourself of your sexiness... Delicious smelling body cream- Strip teasing alone in front of the mirror to music in high heels!!! Reading "He's Just Not That Into You" So Greg can remind you how hot you are....
The cheek of the bloody bastard projecting his own insecurity on to you- whe he couldn't keep his hand off you- was HE that bloody good a kisser? couldn't even get you to relax enough to have a decent orgasm. The last thins you need is that kind of tension...
PLEASE: don't allow his lies to steal the next relationship from you- hasn't he taken enough???
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2009): Gabby,
hmmm good news hell is now over - now its off to rehab to take away the PTSD you will have from the fighting and sniping of the ex.
think of your self turning from a catapillar into a butterfly. you are now in the cocoon stage and soon a butterfly will emerge.
healing your wounds will take time and patenance, find a man who will take you through these things one step at a time slowly.
learn to enjoy sex and find the things that work for you. maybe get a toy to help (a small clitoral one will be good to start? although no expert) and learn to use that. enjoy your body and the men who see you and smile.
you are starting again, but with a shedload of what not to do - thats good info that will help.
star.x.
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