A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hi guys,I've never had a girlfriend before or been on a date up to yet, more because I've been happy being single rather than an inability to speak to girls. Basically my experience with girls has been one night stands and a few fwbs.However, I've decided that it may be time for me to start settling down, I've enjoyed doing my own thing since I was 18 and think it may be time for a change. My question is what is a good way to ask girls on dates? I've got my eye on a few girls I'd like to get to know better, but mainly the place where I see them is on nights out in bars in my local town. I don't know any of these girls so I'd just have to speak to them on the spot and it makes me a little nervous thinking about However, if I don't Approach them I'm never going to be in with a chance of dating them so I'm going to have to suck it up but can't think of many great openers, I've tried to think of a few myself but they just sound awfully tacky and some a little too forward. I've asked a few girls on dates before but not face to face, so I found that easy just to ask if they'd like to go for a drink sometime. But then I flaked out because the idea of a date with a new girl freaked me out, but again I'm not going to get anywhere if I don't actually attend the date, so would appreciate if anyone could advise how to settle my nerves for the date and any interesting conversation starters that I could use myself to get the night flowing nicely.Thankyou
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my ex, never had a girlfriend, one night stand Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (4 January 2017):
Just approach the girl you like and ask her would she like a drink? Then just let the casual conversation flow. If she says no simply smile and say okay you just wanted to say hello and get to know her a bit better.
A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (30 December 2016):
Use your intelligence and imagination.
Quae dant, quaeque negant, guadent tamen esse rogatae.
(Whether they give or refuse women are glad to have been asked.)
Ovid.
Bet you wish you knew that when you were 17. LOL.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (30 December 2016):
Three words of advice (and these apply to the asking and the dating): keep it simple. If you are nervous, the best thing to do with a first date is to keep it short and easy. Meet for a coffee, or go to see a film, which doesn't require much input for the duration of the showing. Afterwards you have something to discuss. Regarding asking girls out, don't wade in and make the first thing you say a request for a date. That will just spook most girls. Chat to them first (keep an eye on when they go to the bar so you can just happen to be there at the same time, or pretend to bump into them, then apologize and get chatting). Ask them to dance if you are a dancer. Then casually ask if they fancy a coffee sometime so you can chat (chatting in a bar is not always easy). Conversation-wise, just show interest in the girl. Ask her questions about herself. "Do you like this music?" "What are you drinking? Can I get you another?" Just be friendly. Good luck.
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