A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:my partner has an ex which he is in touch with as they have a daughter together .. i have been into his mobile phone without him knowing and found a pic of a female ... why ?.. i also found a message from another female . i dont think he is cheating as we spend all our time together but just wanted to know wot u think as to why he feels the need to have such things on his phone. we have only been together 2 years and he is a very good looking guy and women do flock round him but this has made me feel as though im not enough for him. if this was me he would be livid but i cant confront him as i was sneaky about checking his phone Reply to this Question
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female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (7 September 2009):
 I would say that your post says more about you than him. It is not about what the aunts think your partner is up to as no-one here can know for sure. However, the fact that you feel any need to check his phone or anything about him means that you don't trust him deep down. I don't think the way you found out about what is stored on his phone matters, it is just feeding your insecurity about your relationship. I think open and honest communication is the key to sustaining any relationship. If you don't have that, you don't have a good relationship. So, talk to him and ask him about what is on his phone and how he regards your relationship. We all make mistakes and your peeking in his personal info. was just that - a mistake. Own up to your mistake and talk to him about what you want and expect from him in terms of standards of behaviour. I think you need to work on your self confidence and assertiveness - he maybe your partner but you are not dependent on him and his looks to make yourself feel good about you.
A
female
reader, Emaz help +, writes (7 September 2009):
 It dpends what sort of messages of pics they were, if they were friendly ones with no flirting then don't worry about it but if they were more serious then confront him. You had to have a reason or doubts to check his phone and betray his trust him the first place so explain to him why you felt the need to check it, he may be angry at first but he should cool down and if he seems extreamly aggressive and annoyed then he may have things to hide.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2009): Well...when did he receive these pics and what kind of a pic is it? Do you know who these girls are? Could they be someone he knows? In other words.. are these provacitive pics of girls he has met since being with you or are they innocent pics of cousins? Very important detail to make an assesment of the situtation.You say he spends all of his time with you, so you must know him well enough to have some intuitive feeling about this. Try to not react just yet and get more information before you blow it with him.
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