A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Ok, well all type this kind of long and kind of short so fell free for any advice. Well, I think I'm falling in love with my older brothers gf. It did not happen at first, I really love this girl. I don't know how to deal with my feelings any more about love, because I have been heart broken from my first love that broke up with me 2 yrs ago. And now it's my brothers gf, and I don't want to hurt my brother, or my famliy but, I just feel like some thing that is a part of me just does not want me to let go of her, when she leave's, when she hugs me, I feel so strong, like I can do anything. And when she is gone, I can't sleep, or thank about anything but her. So when, did these feelings start for her? well it was one night when we got really drunk over at her house with my brother we have not really talked about it but they where fighting and she was crying because they where fighting and I gave her a hug and told her to clam down, and said I love her and she said the same to me. So I'm really confused, I really love her and I don't know what to do ???
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male
reader, Jingbakla  +, writes (21 March 2013):
This has also happened to me... My brother was dating this girl whom i did'nt know because i was out of station... When i came back he told me about him dating her and i was like ok... One day while i washanging out with him she came and he intoduced me to her... At first i never had any conversation with her because we have neverr met before... Then later we became frens through my brother... Than after just a few days they broke up... But even after breaking up they still chat on the phone and i use to disturb them( in a friendly manner) and they never did mind that... Then one day my while my brother was talking to her i heard that they had a bit of a quarrel and my brother hung up the phone... She called him back and then my brother told me to answer the phone as he was angry so i took the phone and talked to her as she was also my friend... We talked the whole night sharing stories and laughed as we found that we had so much in common.. Our experiences with our past personal lives had so many things in common... We never flirted we jst had a simple friendly and funny conversation... Then the next day we were on the phone again as i rely enjoyed her company... Then the unexpected happened after that night's phone call something changed... I realized that when i woke up in the morning the first thing that came to my mind was her... I kinda missed her and i know that it was realy unexpected not intentional... I never had this feeling or even liked her when i first knew her even while we hang out because me my brother, her and some of my friends usually hangout together...From that day onwards we use to be on the phone for 3 to 4 hours late in the night... Slowly after a few days i started realizing that i have fallen in love with this girl... I have known her since my brother was dating her and i never had this feeling... They dated for only a week or so... I was going crazy because a part of me says that she is my brother's ex girlfreind and this is wrong but as soon as i see or think about her my feelings just takes over... I was so confused as to what should i do... I later learned that the reason my brother dated her was because she accidently sent him a text that she loved him and my brother mistook the message as he thought she meant that... Wel that is what she told me but i still had to look at both sides of the coin and so i asked my brother and he also told me the same thing... After knowing this i said well what the heck i might as well tel her bout my feelings but i still had the slightest doubt that she is my brother's ex... What should i do friends??? Plzzzz give me some good advice because this thing has been eating up my mind ever since...
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2012): "I don't want to hurt my brother, or my famliy but"
But?
I'm sorry OP you seem to be confused, this is a site where we help people not help people ruin their lives and the lives of others.
This isn't DearSatan.org OP, we cannot advise you to do this or help you figure out how.
It all comes to down to this OP, your dick or your family. At the moment you're choosing your dick, you don't love her she's an object you want, you don't love your brother, you don't love your family, you love your dick or you wouldn't be playing this way and risking it all.
You'd stay away from her, you'd stop talking sexy with her friends, you'd go find yourself a girl you can have. Your family and brother don't deserve to have their lives ruined because you first love broke your heart.
If I'm wrong and you do love your family then why haven't you stopped this? Why haven't you made sure you spend no time with this woman?
So choose, your family or your dick, which is more important to you?
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A
female
reader, fishdish +, writes (13 November 2012):
 You have not been listening to us.
Even if she becomes available, she is not someone you should get involved with, period.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks, and a nother weird thing happen we all went out couple weekends ago and her friend started talking to me then just out the middle of no where her friend ask my if I wanted to have sex with her. I said yes and she was like good? Why did her freind ask me if I wanted to have sex with her why could she not have asked me that? And so the other day she came over I was just siting down watching tv and she was taking pics of me on her cell phone whats up with that. And I guess she said she is going to leave him if he does not get a job soon. Do you thank I can have a chance I really love her.
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A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (12 November 2012):
 I think she is just a filler, a comfortable safe person that fills the void your ex has left. You dont love her at all, you just love the comforting feeling you get when you hug her and you love that she is nice to you.
You know this will never go anywhere, ruining your relationship with your family isnt an option so try and get out there and meet some new people. Rather than focusing on your brother's girlfriend, get yourself back out on the dating scene and meet new people, go on dates and start to realise that there is a whole world out there with millions and millions of women available who would be far better suited to you than your brother's girlfriend.
She is just the easy option for your feelings, you see her frequently and she is nice to you so you have latched onto that. If you start dating again and meeting new people you will soon realise there are plenty of other girls out there who you can fall in love with, and you will forget about your brother's girlfriend pretty quickly.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2012): My best advice is to learn the difference between love and infatuation. That is all that is. Love comes from two people who have gotten to know one another and have a deep connection with one another far beyond a drunken night after an argument. All she did was say she loved you but it doesn't mean she loved you in a romantic way. Just as friend who gave her comfort in a time where she was vulnerable. She loved you for being there for her that's all
Before you proclaim your undying love for your brother gf, check your emotions and realize that its simply a high school crush , you will get over
it. Best of luck.
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A
female
reader, fishdish +, writes (12 November 2012):
You look for an available girl. It sucks but you said you weren't even ready to date, so either you are and you should start looking or you just find her comforting and safe, which is not at all- you would be committing a major act of betrayal to your kin otherwise. do not do this. Some loves you just have to let go because of the damage they will cause otherwise: affairs are at the top of that list.
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