A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:please advise me here.i have totally fallen for my best friend i know hes fond of me but dont know how much.on occasions i have vaguely made jokey suggestions and he says he has lots of affection for me in a sisterly way. i was crushed then later he said you know i joke about and he says he trusts me loads and is always calling me several times a day. his friends have told me hes single yet he told me hes casually dating so i know hes fibbing but why and why call me so often its killing me how much i love him
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, bigsister83  +, writes (9 May 2010):
The word "sisterly" is your answer. He adores you--in a platonic way. He obviously values your friendship very much and he's trying to let you down gently. It sucks, it hurts, but it's best to face it and find someone who definitely does not see you like a sister.
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (9 May 2010):
 If you are his center of attractions,then he would love you a lot.
Just enjoy his presence and stop worrying.everything will fall into place when the time is right.
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A
male
reader, J.Love +, writes (9 May 2010):
Stop being so nice. Its time to turn up the sister-tunes, dust off the heels and play girlfriend material.A little liner goes a long way... x
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A
male
reader, drhit1007 +, writes (9 May 2010):
turning a friendship into a "more than a friendship" relationship is a tricky thing. I have many female friends.. some of whom I definitely consider my best friends. I've been attracted to those best friends before. I know some have been attracted to me at times. I have good assumptions that others have liked me as well.. I learned of this.. or realized this after the fact however. I've only brought it up to one of my close female friends, she ended up dating one of my best (male) friends. That was four years ago back in high school. Her current bf goes to the same school as me and she comes up to visit him.. and then somehow manages find and surprise me in the library. I'm extremely happy that our relationship didn't go south after I brought it up. Depending on the person though, it easily could have become awkward.It's one of those things where he could be afraid of what could happen to your current relationship if the future (more than a friend) relationship doesn't work out. I'd be devastated if my friend.. let's call her Jane, wasn't in my life any more. Are you afraid to bring it up? Could you express your feelings towards him without the fear of sacrificing of your friendship? If you can, then talk to him about it. Ask him why he calls you so much.. bring up the fact that you have feelings towards him. Who knows? Maybe he does too. If he doesn't.. then you have to accept being just friends and make sure he knows that you're capable of doing that.
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