A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Oh where to begin, I am at a loss as for what to do. I am a young (17) bisexual male. I have a huge crush on a guy, and to be honest I think there is chance he might be gay/bi too. I am not proud of this next sentence but, when it was really crowded on a bus, and i was right next to him, I copped a feel of his ass, and started feeling his leg and stuff, and he didn't stop me, or even say anything, and it was enough that he should have definitely been able to feel it and it was for quite a prolonged period of time too, about 10 - 15 minutes. I am ashamed of this it was wrong of me I know, there's no need to lecture me on this I know what I did was wrong. But it does make me wonder, well he didn't tell me to stop, does that maybe mean he liked it? This next bit is embarrassing, but someone pushed me into him and my hand accidentally felt his you know what through the fabric of his trousers/pants, and it felt kinda long, as if it was becoming hard, and sometimes when he moved his hands they were on my hands.I don't have a clue what to do. I am a mess at the moment, I am deeply ashamed of copping a feel, but at the same time, i did it quite a lot and he didn't seem to care or tell me to stop, and his you know what, felt like it was getting hard. I haven't got a friggin clue, im still closeted, and im friends with him, and i dont want to ruin that, but then I would like it to be something more. What do I do? I really want to be with him, and I am young and immature and I don't know how to go about this. He might be straight, but there are certain signals im getting that he might be at least bi. He has a very camp close friend, sometimes he can even act a bit camp himself. I just need to know what to do, to explore further.
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male
reader, AvgGuy1  +, writes (27 January 2011):
 You know... you can approach it like this:Um... you know the other day when we were on the bus... I felt your butt, but you didn't seem to be upset with that. I know I shouldn't have done it, but I just find you very attractive/hot - plus you do have a nice ass. I know you noticed cause you turned around to see who it was. Does it bother you?Or something along those lines... and then let him react to that.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionBut he was still talking to me after and stuff, he didn't seem horrified. The one time he looked round I quickly stopped out of nothing but fear. And I was talking to him after it and we were still getting on well, still friendly, still chatting. He's really easy to talk to, that's one of the things I love about him, he listens when I'm talking to him and I can listen to him, he's really interesting and makes great conversation. I was worried too he might have been frozen shocked, but he isn't acting differently towards me, still acting, same friendly guy, he doesn't try to avoid me or anything, which I would have if I'd been frozen in horror.I'm not sure I'm ready to come out, and talk about my feelings yet. I might try some harmless flirting, that could be passed off as joking if he reacts badly to it.
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A
male
reader, C. Grant  +, writes (26 January 2011):
 Just to give a different perspective to the two replies I've seen. He might well have been horrified by what was happening and was frozen by it. If we were given a scenario from a woman groped in a crowded bus, I think you can imagine the responses.
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A
male
reader, The Realist +, writes (26 January 2011):
 Definitely talk to him about it. The worst he can say is that he's straight and doesn't want a relationship, if he was going to get mad about it I think that he would have already.
Also I don't judge you for getting a feel of him, I mean at least he wasn't a stranger because that could get you into bigger trouble. Just say to him that you are attracted to him and that you are wondering if he has any feelings towards you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2011): Sweetie talk to him its the best way to approach your situation. Explain to him that you have an attraction to men see how he reacts if he is a good friend he will be supportive, then take it from there watch how he acts towards you etc. etc.
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