A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:i recently broke up with my long-time boyfriend of 20yrs because of the fact he was cheating on me. I then met another guy and we have been dating for 1yr now. I broke up with him within the last 2wks because i felt that there was someone else. It turns out that i was right, so in short they both cheated on me. Now, my ex of 20yrs wants to come back and my recent ex wants me to stay with him. I am so confused i don't know what to do. They both gave very sincere apologies but i don't know if i believe them or if i even want to stay with either one of them.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2011): to be honest, don't stay with any of them. sure they apologized and told you they want you back but if they want you back they wouldn't of cheated on you in the first place.
so don't please don't get back with either if them because they would most likely do it again in the future. and they most likley got there ass dumped by so random girl your better off single :)
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (18 September 2011):
You'd have to be insane to go back to either man. Neither cared about you enough not to cheat, and their apologies are probably just empty.
Why torture yourself by going back? I think you can do better, and I think you should do better. Too many people accept poor treatment in this world. Don't allow these cheats back into your life.
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A
female
reader, meccamega  +, writes (18 September 2011):
People rarely change from my experience. Could you ever really trust either one? What made them change their mind after so many years? I'd tell them too little too late!
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A
female
reader, lil212 +, writes (18 September 2011):
Hello
I admire you so much for breaking up with these guys that DO NOT deserve you. I have been cheated on and took him back and hey he did it again, there was no trust there and I suppose I never forgot it. My friends have done the same and got their hearts broken time and time again. You have already done the hardest part of leaving them. You will meet a guy that will treat you great and have the respect for you never to hurt you the way these guys have then you'll look back and thank god you never got back with them. If you stay with the wrong guy you will never meet the right guy. You sound like you have more respect for yourself to be with them.
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A
female
reader, chickpea2011 +, writes (18 September 2011):
 Hi,I know exactly how you feel. I have been in a 10 years relationship, just a year found out, still broken. The pain, disappointment, anger, I mean, no words cannot describe. But, you know all well. Cheating is devastating, but not all cases are equal. Mine, I had all the proof in the world for him to admit, confess, and tell me the truth. It has been 1 year now, and he still refused to tell me the truth, so it's over....Your case, you mentioned both men gave you a honest apologie? Then, that proves they are sincerely sorry for what they have done to you. Proves they really care, love, and respect you. So, now the big question? What to do?First of all, I want to say that I am so happy for you that these men came back to you, and realize what an amazing woman you are. I love it!!!!You know what people say, once a cheater always a cheater. But, also I have seem guys that really changed, and now have successful relationship. So, it's up to you, do what your heart desire. It's hard to decide, because one man, you have a long history together, 20 years? The other man, 1 year, pretty serious too? Nobody knows but you. Who do you want to be with? Who do you think deserve a 2nd chance? Who are you more comfortable with? Who do you see a future? Who makes you really happy, more compatible?Keep in mind those questions, and decide. Since, both cheated on you before, this will be like having a new relationship, starting fresh, and new. It's a gamble... But, only you can decide if it's worth another try. I am loving it! I am glad that some of us are happy after all, and have justice done. I am jealous, good way, as a fellow friend that knows what you've been through, and knows how you feel. Keep us post with your decision, and how things go in your life. Hope you make the right decision, and find happiness. You deserve!! Good luck
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A
female
reader, PerhapsNot +, writes (18 September 2011):
 The last thing you need in your life is a former cheater. You were smart and strong enough to break up with them the first time, so don't even entertain the idea of taking either one of them back. I know it's disappointing to have had 2 cheaters in a row, but you will eventually find someone who loves you and only you. Be strong and don't fall for the BS.
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