A
female
age
30-35,
*eckarx
writes:for 7 whole months i have been crushing on this boy and i think its becoming allot more than just a crush, i have told him how i feel and hes just confusing me and sending me the wrong signals and telling me things to confuse me. i dont think i will change my mind about this boy because i think hes becoming an obsession to me, i need advice on getting him to notice me and what shall i do next, i need this boy in my life please helpbecky x
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2008): You already told him how you felt, and yet, he is giving you mixed messages? I am sorry to say this, but I think he is only using you to boost his ego. Remember, it is very easy to confuse obsession with love. Women tend to become obsessed when rejected. Just let it slide, even if it is difficult. How to go about:
1. Keep telling yourself that you are more in love with the idea of him than the real him (I mean, he is using you, and is a total ass!). Maybe you just really want a boyfriend, which is ok, but you are looking in the wrong place!
2. Start loving yourself. This way you will realise that you can do better. Keep telling yourself that you are beautiful, and special, and deserve only the best!
3. Get out there, and meet new people. Go to church, take art classes, play sports... This will help you to develop good self esteem, and might even help you to forget about him. You know, it is like replacing one passion with another. Also, this way, you might find another guy who is more worthy of your time.
Remember, you are still very young, and being single at your age is actually a good thing. Having a serious reationship might prevent you from enjoying your teens. This is the time for you to discover new things about yourself, and to have a good time with friends, so have some fun! Your years of freedom won't last forever, in 5-10 years time you might be married with children, and then there is no way going back!
Hope this helps!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2008): Just be his friend. All good relationships start with friendship first. Invite him to have lunch with you, share a few laughs, show some interest in what interests him. Don't concentrate on making him your boyfriend..just get to know him better, be cheerful and fun loving..just relax and be yourself. If after doing all that if there is any interest on his part he will make a move. Ironically if you take the time to really get to know him you might find that your really not that interested in having him be a part of your life.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2008): hey
if its been 7 months then perhaps hes not worth it;
if he truley likes you then he will want you in his life;
dont go changing for any guy ever
it may be the case of him being shy; dont let him take over your life cus if he rejects you, its the worse feeling
but just go for it n ask him out straight
good luck hope it all works out good for you
x
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A
female
reader, rebecca.megan +, writes (16 July 2008):
 Wow, i had this exact same problem; needless to say, i now go out with him (:
If he knows how you feel, then there's not much more you can do, exept see if he waits to make the first move. You could always hint meeting up together one time, just you two? and see how he responds to that.
If after a while you still find yourself waiting around, then tell him that he's sending off mixed signals and you need to know where you both stand, so you can either be together or move on from him. [as hard as it might be]
The only thing i'l suggest is, if you see each other anywhere, e.g around school, don't try to make him notice you, give him a quick smile and look away, this was he'l be wanting more. The more you try to get his attention, the less you'll get, and the less you want, the more you'll get, if he's into you that is.
Anyways, hope that helped abit& let us kow how it's all going.
x
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