A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Lately I have been feeling kind of confused because I recently found out that my best friend does not like my boyfriend at all. She has seen me get verbally and physically abused in my last relationship and knows I deserve better. My boyfriend is everything a woman could possibly ask for and more. The words also came out of her mouth that he is "a dime a dozen", "but there are more dimes out there". She opened up to me a couple of days ago that she has no type of connection with him, not even on a friendship level. And also, that if she saw him on the street she wouldn't even give him a chance because he's "not the type of person I would hang out with". Its rather confusing because he's ambitious, polite, generous, honest, and loyal. He takes great care of me and we've been together for half a year now and growing. Last night, she told me that if we got as far as marriage she would be surprised. When I asked her why, she said that she can see me with someone greater, and I love him alot to let him pass me by, plus, I probably would never find anybody better because he treats me like a queen. He listens to me, supports me, like a man should. So I REALLY don't understand why my best friend feels the way she does. She says she doesn't know why either. And I refuse to talk to my boyfriend about this, afraid that it would jeopordize our relationship. I live with my best friend, so we talk about everything. What should I do? This is really bothering me.. because now I'm uncomfortable with talking about my experieces with my boyfriend to my best friend... Help me =(
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female
reader, Jendorset  +, writes (21 March 2007):
Are you sure that your best friend doesnt have secret feelings for your boyfriend and is making out she doesnt like him to cover them. Also, she could be worried he is going to come between your friendship with her. Tell her she doesnt need to have a connection with him, because its you thats with him not her. I suppose its better for them to not get along than get along TOO well, if you know what i mean. Tell her that aslong as she is polite to him and doesnt make him feel unwelcome, then you and her wont have a problem.
A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (21 March 2007):
 Could it be jealousy? It sounds like your guy is a great catch. Not everyone is attracted to the same type of man, so she really shouldn't be concerned if he isn't her type, it's your boyfriend after all! She doesn't have to be His best friend either, she just has to be polite and supportive as Your friend. The next time she comes out with a negative comment, speak up! Tell her in no uncertain terms, "John and I are an item now, we are happy together and I hope you will be happy for me as well. Please don't talk badly about John in my presence". Unfortunately, when it comes to couples interacting, it always seems that there is someone who is not impressed with one of the other persons partners. Good Luck with everything.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2007): Do not discuss him. I don't know why women spend so much time(and I am one!) sharing their every thought with each other. In a mature partnership between a man and woman (or other combination)they save such intimate thoughts for each other. Friends are close because they have things in common, not because they share the secrets of their love relationship.
I think your friend is reacting to an attack of allergic jealousy. She is used to being your protector and now she is no longer needed. I am sure she would prefer you to be happy, but she is used to you being abused and her picking up the pieces. Now she wonders what her friendship can be about and misses the closeness that should rightfully transfer to your boyfriend. Lucky you to have such a nice one. You can always talk these things through with her, but don't let her damage your happiness.
about other issues because they talk to each other aboutthat is seen as being disloyal.
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A
female
reader, rammsteinfan +, writes (21 March 2007):
 If your bf treats you with the way you want to be treated (and not being abused mentally or physically), then your friend should keep her thoughts to herself! Don't let her come and meddle with your love life! She should be there for you for everything but your relationship with your bf!
I hope for the best! Good Luck!!
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A
female
reader, funkilla +, writes (21 March 2007):
Does your friend have a boyfriend? If so, try double dating situations so that your friend can see for herself how he treats you. The more she's around you and him, she may warm up to him and change her opinion.
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