A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Ok then, so how are we supposed to use it?We men always keep hearing this whenever we ask for a straightforward question when asked about size. It seems women are afraid to burst bubbles/feelings - this immense beating around the bush more than anything seems to confirm that size do matter.I mean people are willing enough to go into graphic detail on certain sexual preferences but a simple matter of cock preferences just takes the prize for the most drawn out answer ever - which would end up with no answer at all.I like to think that if women were very straightforward with this question it may end this wonder once and for all about whether or not these men are satisfied about their dicks, all they have to do is just search and voila! "Yes my cocks is perfect", "fuck, I suck!", "maybe a little bigger wouldn't hurt" - no more questions. I understand every woman is different, but all we would need is a general idea here, instead we're put on this 'draggg' when it shouldn't.Let's say you have sex with someone who has a large penis and knows how to use it, and also with a man with a small penis and knows how to use it too. Which would you prefer from just purely the physical standpoint on pleasure? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, happy as ne  +, writes (15 November 2008):
my wife is the only women ive been with that likes her cervics hit real hard. i am 7.25 long. not trying to bragg. i have been told all to much that i wasnt the biggest by most of the women ive been with. most of them couldnt even fit all of me. at my size i cant wear shorts because it makes a buldge that even makes other men stare and call me tripod. i should be proud but im not. women like to say they have had bigger but i dont see them use what i got.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (13 September 2008):
 I like vanilla, chocolate, rum raisin, chocolate chip cookie dough, peach, caramel swirl, and most of the Ben & Jerrys line. Which do I prefer over all others? Depends on the day. Sorry, I'm not trying to be irritating, that's the truth.
...............................
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (13 September 2008):
Dude... the thing is that women have different sized vaginas too!!!
So lets say 5 or 10 years ago, a 5 inch narrow gage guy would have been perfect. 7 inches would have been terrifying. In a few more years time once I've squeezed out a couple of babies, I might find a narrow penis a bit unsatisfying.
I have never measured my husband so I don't know how big he is, but I think he is perfect. He's amazing in bed.
My ex boyfriend was HUGE but wasn't interested in foreplay. It was all about just getting me ready for sex, and if you had foreplay once, then had sex, then a few mins later had sex again then if he had to do foreplay again, well that was just me being greedy in his view.
Plus he just used to shove it in and out and be like "yeah I'm huge so you're automatically going to have multiple orgasms." There was no kissing, or touching or feeling. His hands went where he fancied putting them, mostly on the bed to either side of me for balance.
He was also a bad kisser.
Anyway, my point is that there is no optimum size, it's all about how you treat the girl and what else you do during the whole sex package, not how much you stretch us out down there.
Good Luck!! xx
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2008): Remember how you got the woman into bed in the first place, guys. You probably talked about everything with her but the size of your John Thomas. So now that you're in bed with her, what makes you think that size suddenly becomes important? Life is all about the bell shaped curve (remember statistics at school - assuming you attended!). Most men are in the average zone and that's what a woman would be expecting when she undoes your zipper/poppers/velcro/buttons/toggles/flaps. Anything less and she will be a little disappointed. A good deal more and she will be in pain. My favourite thing is to give a woman oral sex - turns me on since that is very intimate and naughty. But then I'm worrying whether my tongue's too small, or too big. Do women prefer a really big 8 inch tongue? Do they prefer a forked tongue? Shall I crawl on my belly in front of her and shed my skin after sex? Must dash - my kids are drawing on the carpet (for inspiration!). Yours, FifthQuadrant.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2008): I have always understood that there are more important things out there than the size of our package. It was beat into my head for many times over and I don't need to have that happen again I get the point.My gripe is, it's just something simple that requires a simple answer which I'm fascinated to know. Everyone has preferences, and people are willing to share them, but for some reason we keep getting lectures whenever this kind of question pops up.It's like asking for what flavour ice cream you prefer, but instead of recieving a simple answer we're given talks about company, quality, brand etc, which is of course more important overall - 'but' I'm just asking about the flavour.
...............................
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (13 September 2008):
It's not beating around the bush (that's a bad pun, by the way) that women are doing. You guys are so focused on your penises that you're missing the bigger picture. And we women, being superior beings, don't compartmentalize like men do. (Just kidding about the superior being part, but not about the compartmentalization.) You're trying to apply male 'logic' to the female brain.
I apologize for making any sweeping generalizations in advance, and I'm not speaking for all women and all situations, say the one-night-stand.
Look, I know that it's really really hard for men to understand. We like a nice penis, but you see, it's connected to a man, and it's the man who matters the most in this. You want it to be all simple and for us to say, "Your penis must be like this," and then you guys can all take that yardstick and place yourself into some hierarchy of sexual desirability.
I'm not sure you're going to want to hear this, but penis size is like 10% of what a woman cares about when it comes to sex, let's call it the Sexual Desirablity Scale. That's a rough estimate, and for some women, it may be higher. I'd say a good 50% of the SDS is how the man treats her OUTSIDE the bedroom. Yes, irritating for you, isn't it? You can't just show up in the bedroom and expect to have her swooning when the trousers are unzipped. Nope, we start judging you from the moment you start dealing with us. We women are SO shallow! Another 10% is overall physical attractiveness, then the remaining 30% is how you treat us in bed. Boggles the mind, doesn't it? We have this complex set of judgement criteria and you all want us to care only about your penis size.
Okay, to answer your question. Neither. Medium is best, when attached to the right guy for you.
Wasn't that a long walk around a really big bush? ;)
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2008): Size matters and it doesn't. It doesn't matter because most women care more about the affection and love that you show, how good you are at foreplay and oral skills and how much caring about her enjoyment you show while having sex.
It also does matter because most women have a size that feels the best for them. My wife likes 6 inches the best, but anything between 5 and 6.25 is great for her. One that is longer than 6.5 inches starts to hurt her in many positions as it hits her cervix and rough sex is out of the question. In a couple of discussions that I have read on other discussion boards, some women say they like 5 inches the best and some say 8 inches or longer, but the average seems to center around 6 inches. Hey, one of those women in porn who can stuff a wine bottle up there is not going to be happy with an average guy.
My wife used to have a boyfriend who she thinks was about 8 inches and somewhat thick. He was a fairly good lover and she was happy with their sex. However, he never got it in the entire way, always had to be careful that he didn't hurt her and couldn't ever get rough with her, which she likes sometimes. He also told her that he had hurt other women, so it was not just her.
So size does matter if it is big enough to hurt most of the time if not careful or if it is small enough to have difficulty staying in or being difficult to feel in there. Otherwise, the other aspects of sex matter more.
...............................
A
female
reader, deejuliet +, writes (13 September 2008):
 I think the last poster put it all very well. But I will add this: when we say it is how you use it we mean that you need to pay attention to the female. Her pleasure should be paramount to you. If your greatest concern is that she is pleasured, then believe me! she is going to think you have the greatest dick ever to grace a mans crotch! A guy with a huge dick who thinks he has it made and that all he needs to do is stick it in a girl and she will explode with pleasure is in for a sorry suprize. There is so much more to it than that! Kissing, hugging, fingering, touching, massaging, oral. Do all of these things and when she is in extasy add penetration with a dick of just about any size and she will be in heaven.
...............................
A
male
reader, saltwater +, writes (13 September 2008):
 This question is irrelevant.
If you're going to have sex with a woman who is concerned about your penis length then she is not the woman for you.
In a relationship most women don't care about your penis length -- because sex within a relationship is a supplement to the relationship. It doesn't even matter if you "use it" properly...that is not the "meaning" of sex.
It's like breast size. Most men don't care about the size of a woman's breasts; and those men that do are shallow.
It doesn't matter if your dick is big, small, thick or thin; in a relationship these things doesn't matter.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2008): Say there are two men. One is bigger than the other and they both know how to use it with equal skill. As long as the bigger one doesn't cause the woman pain, the bigger penis is probably better. However, since any two given men usually aren't of equal skill, this is what draws women to honestly say that how you use it is more important than size. Skill Size. Definitely.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2008): Ok I'm willing to be honest on this issue.
Of course size matters. If it's too small, we can't feel it. If it's too big, it causes more pain than pleasure. Every woman has different limits on what's too small and too big based on their pain threshold and anatomy, but essentially the size of the penis DOES play into the amount of pleasure that can be yielded from it.
I'd say in general most women would prefer a 6 inch penis over a 12 inch or a 1 inch. But as far as the more average range of penis- say, from 4.5 inches to 8 inches, the size ISN'T all that important (maybe other women would set their average range differently, but in my experience I find most pleasure in penis that fall within this range, whereas too much smaller or too much bigger isn't as good- that's just me & my anatomy though).
If you fall into a 'happy medium' zone, then you have an advantage of feeling good most of the time (depending on how hard/soft you are)... and all that's left is to work on a technique that works between you and your partner. Every woman likes different things so the guideline as to how to use it isn't easy to set up, it's up to individual couples to decide.
As for your last question, I guess sexual experiences vary so much aside from penis size and even whether or not you orgasm (i.e. smells, sights, emotions, how long it lasts, etc)... assuming that all other things are equal and the only difference between two experiences is the penis size then I'd say that... yes, perhaps I would prefer a larger penis. Mostly because I love the way bigger ones feel in my hand, I also love the way that they look. Of course if it were more than 8-9 inches, there wouldn't be much pleasure to be had from it but if it is around that range then I suppose it is preferable.
The most important deciding factor though is the man that is attached to it. If I had to choose between a man who was great in bed and had a reasonably sized dick, but who was an asshole, a cheat, a liar and a drunk, and a man who had a more average sized penis, but was personable, friendly, fun to be with, faithful, etc... Man number 2 wins EVERY TIME. Cultivate your personality lads, it'll make you more attractive than a big penis ever will.
That's my take on it, others may disagree or add to it... I hope it was helpful.
...............................
A
female
reader, AnnalovesJrock +, writes (13 September 2008):
 SIZE does matter, BUT anything TOO Much (TOO big or TOO small) is not good! Every women has their own preferences, if you ask me I like just right. If its too big it hard to go down south and give my partner the pleasure. If its too small, I wont get turned on.
I hope that was blunt enough for you =)
...............................
|
