A
female
age
30-35,
*mandanash
writes:This isn't a relationship question, but rather wanting an opinion if I am in the right or wrong about what I think. My dad has moved away for a job, so he comes home once or twice a month. My parents are very much in love with each other, which I am thankful for as we are a very close family. Now that my dad has moved away, my parents obviously don't spend as much time together. It's expected that they have, well, certain "night time activities" planned out. The only problem is, they are now very loud and evident about it, don't wait for myself to be in bed or asleep and they leave things like lube etc. out in the open. After a few weekends of brushing it off, I finally told them I didn't appreciate them being loud, having sex while they KNEW I was awake and around the house, and leaving lube and sex toys out in the open.In my opinion, when you have children that live with yo still, you should respect them and not have sex when you know they will hear you, or leave toys and lubes out where they can clearly be seen without even entering their room. My parents are quite livid that I am upset about the matter, so I am here to ask if I am being completely irrational like they say I am, or do I have at least somewhat of a valid point?Thank you
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2011): Hi
Your sort of right in the errrrrrr factor no one want's to know or hear their parents doing that thing! lol
But thats life and that is why you are here going errrrrrrr.
I think you should consider giving them time alone when you know pappa's home, you are old enough to do your own thing and could possibly consider getting your own space rather than staying at home. So cool that they have the passion and are not just watching boring tv and they are open.
spunky monkey
spunky monkey
A
male
reader, spinnaker  +, writes (11 June 2011):
 I must confess I could not stop laughing at the awkwardness of your situation. For that I am sorry.
One thing you can be thankful for is that your folks still have some steam in their stride when it comes to the bedroom. If I asked my parents when the last time they had sex was they would probably tell me to look at my drivers license.
You are right, they should respect the fact that you live in the house as well. It would be no different if you blasted your stereo all night and interrupted their lives.
Unfortunately for you the only solution is to either put up with it or leave - since it is their house.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2011): Oh boy, that's quite the question.
I agree that very, very few of us are comfortable with the idea of our parents being sexual beings. And having the sort of, er, confirmation you're getting, is at best awkward.
Now, let me give you the other side. I have kids who are 18, 16, and 13. There was a time when we could count on them to be asleep by 9:00 or 10:00, so we could keep that part of our marriage alive. In recent years that hasn't been the case -- my kids are up waay past my wife's bedtime. And my wife, unlike your mother, would never dream of having sex when there was the slightest chance the kids could hear. As a result, we will sometimes go two months between opportunities. And let me tell you, after four or five weeks without any intimacy, I'm about ready to leave.
Given you parents' circumstances, it's quite understandable that they're seizing the moment. Would you rather they divorce, just so you're not made uncomfortable by something that's an essential part of a successful marriage?
Meet them half way -- negotiate a time to be away from home for two or three hours to give them the privacy they need.
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A
female
reader, Aunty Susie  +, writes (11 June 2011):
 I am not aware of any rules on this topic, but for me personally, children should not have to hear their parents having sex. Are you the only child at home? (Though at your age you are hardly a child.) Maybe its time to move out. It is your parents home, and they probably feel that they should be able to behave as they wish.
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