A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hello. I have just moved back in with my ex again (a couple of months ago). As ever to get me back he said he wanted babies and a home together. Instead I have ended up spending my savings while sitting in his bachelor place waiting for him to join me in a mutual plan for the future. Instead he has kept saying "you must make your own plans" and refused to discuss anything with me. This is about the third time this has happened over the last seven years. Anyway, in desperation I have been applying for courses all over the country and now it looks like I am going to have to go further into debt and do one even though it is useless, just so I have a place to go. I don't even have the money to move now, really, I will have to live in a tent. I know my partner thinks he loves me and he is a sweet person but he doesn't really care. How do I get over this again? The first two times I felt at least I had some hope for the future. Now at my age I feel really really sad - my chances for children are disappearing, and once again I find myself leaving a man I love because there is no other hope or way forward. And this time to a future I have no faith in and no money for. How do I cope?
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female
reader, hlskitten  +, writes (10 September 2008):
 Its horrible when you come out of it worse than the previous time you split. I'm sure we all go through that even if its only once, its mighty frustrating. I remember ending it with a guy because he lied, then i let him manipulate us back together, then we split a few months later and i was a few grand worse off! Would of given anything to turn the clock back and only of had him lie to me! So all i can say is, cut your losses at anytime. Because with people like that, it doesn't get any better, only worse!
Its far better to accept that the guy isn't going to offer you what you really want and walk away with a heavy heart, than to leave it and hope its going to get better. Cuz you can bet your bottom dollar after 7 yrs of being let down, it wont.
In even a yrs time from now, you will be wishing you left a yr ago!
See what i mean?
C xxxx
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (10 September 2008):
I'm sorry you have no money - but it seems this man lied to you about his intentions.
Try and get some money together and go somewhere, anywhere. Does he not provide anything? Has he never bought you anything nice?
If so then sell it and use the cash to move out.
Going to uni is a good plan as you will meet lots of new people and maybe even a handsome mature student.
There is always a way to survive, you can work while on your course, and find a good course to switch to.
Good Luck!! xx
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