A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey everyone,I'm having a few issues with my current boyfriend. The thing is, he's spending a lot of time with his current ex girlfriend who he claims to still be a very good friend. He's driving her around a lot, picking her up here and there to do things and most likely because I've had a lot on with a busy schedule. After an argument a few months ago about a similar issue, I've learned to trust him and convince myself that nothing's going to happen between them. However, I do not trust her. I see what she writes to him online and she's such an a**-kisser that it's rather sickening. She has the typical innocent face but and is supposedly very sweet, but it's seriously irritating and he always gives into her. It's getting to the point where he's seeing her more than he's seeing me. What is really annoying me is the fact that he accuses me of cheating on him after having met up with a friend who is desperately trying to get his ex girlfriend back and I met up with him to give him support and advice. For about a week my boyfriend was convinced that I was cheating on him when I would never do anything of the sort. He has cheated before in the past once and it affected him so much emotionally and mentally that everyone says they know that he would never do it again. So I've learned to trust him. I don't understand why it's fine according to him to meet up with his EX and NOT OKAY for me to meet up with a FRIEND IN NEED.He said beforehand that he can't trust anyone after he himself cheated in the past so I told him to learn to trust me or that it would end so clearly he made an effort to trust me. It's still really bugging me that his ex will not back off and I'm afraid of what will happen this time if I confront him about it. Someone help me? :(
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female
reader, cmgtlr2010  +, writes (6 July 2011):
i know exactly how u feel because right now i am going through the same thing except my boyfriend has a kid with this girl right now i dont even know if he is my boyfriend he still tells me he loves me but i dont know anymore hes done this in the beginning of the relationship and i forgave him and now its happening again. and its just lie after lie. so advice for u i know its hard cause im in the same boat right now leave his ass unless u wanna get hurt later on down the road by him . trust me its not worth the pain im going through it right now as im writing this and i would never wish the hurt im feeling now upon anyone its cruel. and if he loves u enough he will respect u if not get rid of him. if he doesnt have any ties to her like a kid or something and hes hanging out with her leave his ass!!! its not worth it find someone who will treat u right and wants to spend time with u and just u not anyone else. and trust me dont get with anyone that has a kid. because it all goes down hill from there. good luck to you and i hope u can get through this. be strong.
A
male
reader, xnickx +, writes (6 July 2011):
 I wouldnt trust your boyfriend. If someone cheats once, they'll cheat again, and I wouldnt buy the i'm so emotionally disturbed line either.But then again, he's your boyfriend, not mine, lol. You know him better than any of us, so you'd know best whether you can trust him or not.The easiest fix is to make him put things in perspective. Have him choose between you or her. Of course, he may not like this approach, and you might not like the outcome either. But it's definately an option if all else fails.You said youre afraid of what might happen if you confront him about it. But i think it's better you confront him about it now, than you find out later he has another girlfriend on the side.Explain your feelings to him. Tell him youre hurt that hes spending so much time with her. Relationships really are about openess, trust and compromise. If he doesnt care that he's hurting you, and continues to do things for her, then i'd watch out if i were you...But if it truely is innocent on his part, then this whole situation should resolve itself if you are honest with him about how you feelBest of luck,nick.
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