A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I met this awesome girl who works at at restaurant about 3 months ago. At that time I had a girlfriend who she met when we cam in to eat. I have now been single for a couple of months and decided to roust up the courage to ask for her number. She gave it to me and said she would love to go out sometime. I called her a couple days later and she returned my call and suggested a date monday. Well, she had to work on our date nite and said sorry, but suggested I come to visit her at work. I can definitely feel she has an interest but it seems like she is playing the "ot wanting to seem too eager game." She said she would love to go out on her next day off and she would call me but it's been a couple days and haven't heard back from her. What do you think? (this was monday night and she said she'd call tuesday but never did) BTW, there has been a good deal of smiling and flirting but It's still so tough to read her.
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male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (5 October 2007):
 Man, as to "knowing for sure", what if you called her, she agreed to a date, and then she called you unexpectedly and said she won't be able to make it?
If you just can't hold yourself back, wait at least seven days before calling her. If she has any interest, she will respond as she should. But, I think you should let HER call you.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionDaniel, yea I noticed it's been another day and no call. Sucks cause I really feel positive about this girl. I am still on the fence about calling her or not. As someone said in the post below, at least I would know for sure if I just bit the bullet and called her.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (4 October 2007):
One more thing: it's been yet another day that she hasn't called. Did you notice?
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A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (4 October 2007):
Yep, I know this is driving you mad. This is why I would like you to take it easy and wait for her to call you.
You don't really know where you stand. You wish you could read her. But, very obviously you fancy her. When this happens, you can easily project your own feelings and expectations on the other person, and misread signs. You need solid ground to stand on. That is why, you need a clear, unequivocal sign from her; and that sign would be her calling you.
I don't like the fact that there is always something that prevents you from seeing her. It can be bad luck, bad timing, busy schedules, whatever; or, it can be lack of interest. In your situation, you will ask her out, and she will have the last word whether she accepts or not. You may have no clue whether she is not accepting because she can't, but she's interested, or whether she is not accepting because she doesn't want to accept. REMOVE THE DOUBT. Wait for her to give you a signal you can't mistake for something else.
Believe in this advice, man. I've been there.
As to playing hard to get, isn't that a game two can play? Let HER do the calling now.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionDaniel, yes I'm positive she knows I'm single now. i have this gut feeling that she is an awesome girl so I think I should call her but all this chasing is driving me mad! :)
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A
female
reader, Floss  +, writes (4 October 2007):
 You can drive yourself mad waiting for her to call or just go ahead and do it yourself. Whatever her answer at least you will know and that has to be better than not knowing. You say your pretty sure that she likes you, well then your probably right. Maybe she just wants you to chases her a little. If ye do go out maybe you should let her know that you dont like to play games. Keep us posted
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A
male
reader, Tommy7 +, writes (4 October 2007):
Hang in there are make that date, she may turn out to be wonderful.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (4 October 2007):
You're contradicting yourself here. You suppose she is very interested, but, at the same time, you say she is hard to read. This means you don't know where you stand. I suggest you err on the safe side, and let her do the calling. You have already made your interest well known. It's her turn to show whether she is interested. I see you do all the chasing.
By the way, I would hate to ask a question that might be obvious, but, does she know you're free now?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 October 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm almost certain she's interested because I did take her up on her offer and went to see her on the night she had to work. I guess that's a good sign that she invited me to see her right? I just can't figure out why she hasn't called to arrange a date? Should I bite the bullet and call her or wait a little longer? ARRGHH! These games are crazy and you women seem so hard to figure out! :)
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A
female
reader, Floss +, writes (3 October 2007):
from what you said, it sounds to me that she does like you, however she does sem to be playing it cool for whatever reason. Why dont you bite the bullet one more time and try to arrange a date, if however she lets you down again, cut your losses. At least this way you know you will have tried. I hope it works out for you
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A
female
reader, lovejunkie  +, writes (3 October 2007):
 No, it doesn't sound like she's playing games to me. It sounds like she had to end up working on a night you had originally planned to go out. Maybe someone called in sick and she had to pull and extra shift. She invited you to come see her that night, did you go?...Even though she said she'd call you and hasn't so far, why not go ahead and give her a ring and see if she's interested in going out when she has another night off? If she makes excuses, or ends up having to work again, it could be that she's not that interested in you and she's trying to be nice about it (she may even be seeing someone and just hasn't mentioned that to you). It's hard to tell at this point.
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