A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Me and my boyfriend have been with each otehr over a year, and we're having trouble when it comes to sex. This isn't your usual... it only takes him three minutes! This is.. oh god, it takes him nearly three hours. We've tried to work each other up for sex, we have rules that we follow sometimes, like we can't kiss each other too much or touch each other inappropriatly. This means by the time its the evening and we're alone, we have the most passionate sex I could ever imagine. Although, it takes him a long time to finish, he doesn't get nervouse and we certainly don't have problems getting him hard but it takes so long I start to hurt and wish we were finished. Any advise? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (31 August 2010):
 foreplay is the key to great sex. Sounds like you all just go right to it and there's no suspense. Believe it or not you're considered a lucky girl by some. many guys suffer from premature ejaculation and their wives complain about that. Slow foreplay. Read up on tantric sex it'll help too.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2010): ok i will tell you the truth, its not him.... its you...sorry but im about 95% certaini am a guy and i also had this problem with my current girlfriend of 3 years.... it would take me forever to cum. her vagina was just not tight enough...see, the thing is when i would have sex with my ex-wife she would make me cum within minutes... but my ex wife also did kegals all the time and she just had an all around smaller vagina than my current girlfriend does. needless to say this is what definitely made me spill my load in her quickly.my current girlfriend does kegals too now and she can make me cum in about 5 minutes versus the 1-2 hours it use to take her to make me cum. and sex is amazing now because every time i stroke my dick out of my girlfriend, i can feel her pussy clenching to my dick and squeezing it, needless to say, usually makes me cum withing minutes. i love it now!!! my gf's pussy is even better than my ex-wifes now, but she would have never reached that milestone without doing kegals, im pretty sure...just remember, kegals are everything, and make sure you squeeze your bf's dick everytime he strokes in or out, if you want to make him cum quickly. hope this helps
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A
female
reader, Gabrielle Stoker  +, writes (31 August 2010):
 Have you tried telling him this? Most men in this situation are actually holding themselves back. (as opposed to those with ED who never cum at all).
I suggest using your hands more, it tends to lead to faster ejaculation.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2010): My guy also takes longer than most, but three hours would kill me!
Maybe you could masterbate him some until he's closer to ready and then just let him finish off inside of you? I would also recommend some good gel for both you to use with your hand job and to help keep you from getting sore.
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A
male
reader, mb129 +, writes (31 August 2010):
Something tells me there is more to this story. A few possibilities that you need to explore are -
- Has he had this issue in the past with other women?
- Is he trying to be tantric?
- Is he wearing a latex condom? Might want to explore other condoms such as the Trojan Supra which is a different material, or the Naturalamb if you are 100% + 100% sure that there are no STDs to pass around. Maybe get tested first before doing that. Because I know it can take me a long time when I am wearing a latex condom.
Agree with previous poster, if he is taking too long and it is just dragging out for you, there should be a way for him to just get to it.
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A
female
reader, answerfromtheheart +, writes (31 August 2010):
 Please learn Kegel Exercises. If you want to help your guy finish quicker, you must learn how to squeeze your pelvic muscles (it's the same muscles that you use if you want to stop the flow of urine once it's started) Practice everyday until you get good at it.
Squeeze the muscles when he is coming out of you. It creates suction and stimulates the shaft as well as everything else.
Works very well, and makes the sex better.
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